Someone Like you
by Lilla Black
Summary: A Jake and Bella Story: Jake imprints on Bella and after a run in with Victoria Bella realizes her true feelings for Jake but when Edward returns decisions have to be made and they will effect everything. How New Moon should have happened.
1. Chapter 1

Jacob.

Nothing makes me feel more free than running, it's the silver lining to this entire mess. The speed is unbelievable, _but why are you running away Jake?_ The little voice in the back of my head asked again, and I pushed it away, I didn't want to think about _that_ right now. But I felt as if the moment _it_ crossed my mind I couldn't ignore it, I ran harder and faster as that fateful almost 6 weeks ago came flooding back to me. The details of that one moment hit me like a tonne of bricks, it is the same every time, and I knew no amount of time would make those/these feelings any different.

"_Jake please" her voice echoed in my ears and I flinched as her soft hand lifted my face so she could see my eyes. As I gazed into her endless brown eyes I felt everything in my life shift. Bella was all I could see; water droplets clung to her dark wavy hair, and made her long black eyelashes glisten against her creamy skin, her perfect pink lips were parted slightly. As she blinked her wide chocolate eyes everything I had held sacred seemed distant, the love for my farther, and my brothers, for Rachel and Rebecca and my mom all seemed to slip from my mind as I gazed into Bella's eyes. _

"_Jake!"_ Embry's voice was loud in my hazy mind and the pictures in my clouding my head suddenly vanished.

"_Jake man you've gotta tell her."_ Embry begged I could hear his footsteps they were gaining momentum, he was running to me, I cursed my self for forgetting that I was currently running on patrol, but mostly for forgetting that Embry was running my parallel and could head and see everything I was thinking.

"_No_." I argued adamantly and although I knew he couldn't see me I shook my muzzle.

"_She will understand Jake, she took the werewolf thing so well, and you and her could be happy, trust me man the imprint thing its not that bad, besides you already loved Bella its not like it changes anything." _

"_Em! It changes everything and you know it, I will NOT take away her choice like that. Of course I loved her before but that doesn't make a difference, I will not guilt her into loving me, or make her thing she has no choice, I couldn't do that to Bella."_ My mind shook with the conviction of my words, but I wished with all my heart that they weren't true.

"_But Bella loves you Jake, we can all see that, you know she does Jake, you've just gotta step up." _Embry tried still but his words or his thoughts rather had hit a nerve.

"_you think I'm to chicken!" I yelled thankful that Paul wasn't phased in, he would be merciless mocking me at the moment. _

"_You think I am to afraid to tell Bella how I feel. What the hell man. She's not ready, she cant have people just waltzing up to her and telling her they love her, she would freak she's still not over.. That leech." _Acid filled my words was I spat the last two words and my broad wolf chest heaved with anger.

"_But you aren't just any guy." Embry's voice was smaller now, he didn't want me to be mad, but I couldn't help it. _

"_Just drop it Em."_ I said harshly and regretted my tone immediately.

"_Hey Em, man I'm sorry I know your just trying to help, I just.. I cant stand… can we talk about something else?"_ I asked and hoping he understood the double meaning of my question.

"_Don't worry about it, just wish it wasn't like this for you man."_ Embry said sincerely, and I thanked him we ran in silence for a while completing our loop and running back towards forks and La Push in a comfortable silence.

I felt it before I smelt it. my stomach dropped with a feeling of dread, it was something I had never felt before but I understood it immediately, from all the legends Sam had been pumping into my head over the last few weeks. It was the imprint.

"_Bella_." I yelled and i could hear the pain in my own voice, and Embry understood immediately, he let out a long howl and we raced towards forks, I felt Embry stiffen as we crossed over the scent, he let out an understanding whine and we pushed on faster still heading towards forks. The scent was the sickly sweet smell of the red headed vampire. I pummelled my paws against the hard grown of the forest floor, desperately raving towards Forks, towards Bella.

"_It'll be ok Jake." _

"_Hey man, breathe" _

"_Jake, just focus." _

"_Will save her Man." I heard the voices of my brothers pop into my head as they phased in and joined the race towards forks._

"_Jake, we will end this, now. And Bella will be alright." Sam's alpha tone burst through my head, but I could hear the doubt in his voice but i couldn't listen to any of them, I had to get to bella, I just had to. _

"_I'm coming Bella. I'm coming." I thought desperately hoping that somehow she knew I would come and save her. _


	2. Chapter 2

_BELLA_

I was alone… again.

I walked to the back window looking out over the lush green forest, I scanned and listened intently but I could see nothing but the gentle sway of the trees obscured by the thin haze of rain, and I could hear no more than the soft tweet of birds. Jacob was out running patrols, and I knew my weaker human senses wouldn't have a hope of detecting him as he speed through the deep forests between forks and La Push.

I made my way back to the living room falling heavily back on to couch and letting my thoughts wander.

It had been 6 weeks and 3 days since Jacob had bought me inside the loop and told me all about his part in the pack of enormous werewolves that were roaming around the reservation.

_I could see the frustration in his eyes, as I pushed his face up gently to look at him, but there was something else to pain and… adoration. I shook my head a little at the stupidness of my thoughts, as I turned to look back at Jacob I could have sworn I sore him grimace. _

"_Jake please" I whispered again a little more conviction in my voice and I bought my hand slowly back down from his check. _

"_I can't tell you Bella." Jake yelled his voice was full of pain and anger, it bought goose bumps to my skin and I felt my stomach lurch as I felt his rejection sink into me, he saw my reaction and his face fell. _

"_Not here." He whispered and I could hardly here him but I understood what he meant, as he spoke his eyes softened and he was my Jacob, and he was asking me to understand. _

"_FINE!" I screamed opening my car door; I understood as I looked away from Jacob, standing partly hidden behind the trees was Sam Ulley and 3 other enormous boys. _

"_I'M GOING HOME!" I yelled again slamming the truck door and desperately hoping Jacob was picking up on my instructions. _

"_Fine. Don't Come Back" Jacob shouted, and even though I knew his words were an act they stung to hear all the same. _

_I waited at Charlie's house for hours, I cleaned the kitchen and the bathroom, vacuumed the living room, and did 2 loads of laundry before I started out on Charlies dinner, I choose lasagne because I new it was the most time consuming, and still there was no Jacob. I felt angry tears spring to my eyes, but those of sorrow quickly replaced them as I realised that my Jacob was gone. _

_There was a game on the night, so Charlie ate his food in the living room, in front of the flat screen, I gave him a small smile before wearily climbing up the stairs to my room. it was to early to sleep but I didn't care I took a shower which regrettably did nothing to warm me or take away the quickly coming pain. The hole in my chest left by my absent Vampires was in the back of my mind now, and a new wound had opened up, I felt cold all over like I was standing in the shade, like my sun had vanished behind thick grey clouds. Tears were in my eyes as I felt my self-drifting into a restless sleep. _

_My eyes snapped open alarmed, I felt my blood cool and my heart stop as I heard the sound that had awoken me once more, it the sound of something, I presumed nails, scarping down my window, in an instant memories came flooding back to me, the trio of nomads at the field were we, no _they_ had played baseball. There was James but I knew he was dead. Then Laurent, he was around those giant wolves had chased him away from me three days ago, but I knew he would still be around and if not he would have reported back to Victoria. And then my thoughts stopped and I froze, fiery red hair, feline features her mouth turned up into a vengeful snarl. _

"_Bella!" I heard the husky voice outside the window and got up from my bed my mind was frozen with fear but I had to understand why the husky voice that I knew better than anything was coming from outside my window. _

"_Jake." I whispered and all my prior pain and fear vanished as I saw him dangling precariously from a tree, his feet on my window frame. I pushed the window open and Jake pulled himself surprisingly gracefully through the window. _

"_May I ask why you are trying to get yourself killed by falling off the side of my house." I asked haughtily my arms folded across my chest. _

"_I have to keep my promise." He said softly his voice riddled with pain. _

_I dropped my arms at once, he had come back, he, he wasn't going to leave me, I rushed to Jacob and through my arms around, he held me tightly in a bear hug before putting me back on the ground, he sat me down on my bed, keeping his strong warm hands on the tops of my shoulders he looked into my eyes intently and explained everything, I clasped a hand over my mouth in shock. And he looked at me worriedly; he grabbed my hand away from my mouth. _

"_Bella tell me what you are thinking." He begged his voice was a mixture of fear and ager._

"_Does every freaking fairy have to come true." I whispered and Jacob grinned hugely. _

I shook my head as the memory drifted away and I came back to the reality. i was lonely, there was no other way of describing it, ever since discovering that Victoria (also know as the red-headed blood sucker) was on a revenged mission centred around me, The entire pack had stepped up patrols especially Jake. There were 7 wolves in total, but I knew that number was subject to change at any moment, depending on the number of vampires in and around Forks and La Push; Sam Uley was the alpha and the oldest wolf, like Jake said I had been very wrong to assume anything about Sam, then there was Paul and Jarrod, Jake Embry and Quil and now 15 year old Seth Clearwater who was the youngest and newest member of the pack, which worried both Sam and Jacob greatly.

I thought back to my spring break, I had spent every day in La Push, either with Jacob, who I was constantly worried about, or Emily Sam's kind and beautiful ,yet badly scarred, fiancé. When there was no one else around to 'babysit' me I would walk along the tide line of first beach waiting for Jake to come back from his patrols, or thinking up schemes in which I could make him rest or at least slow down for a little while. Jake and Billy had both apologized a hundred times for 'ruining' my vacation but from Victorias ability to evade capture it wasn't safe for me, or Charlie to be spend much time back in Forks. I argued against there apologize and after a while all four of us (including Charlie) realised that I felt safer, more at home and more like the real Bella than I had in months.

Now that school was back in session things were getting difficult, I couldn't spend every day in La Push, and Charlie was getting suspicious and Jacob was getting more worried and restless. I missed him more and more everyday we hadn't been able to hang out as Bells and Jake in weeks, and I felt myself falling apart at the seems without Jacob to old me together. I glanced up at the clock it read 2:39pm and I smiled knowing that Jake was coming to pick me up in an hour and 21 minutes; I raced back up stairs glad that I had finally managed to pass the day, I took a shower and dried my hair. I was excited and anxious to see Jake again, I felt guilty and selfish knowing full well that his feelings for me were changing and worse still was that I was letting them. I shook my head again and pulled on a pair of snug jeans and a dark blue fitted blouse, trying to block out the painful memories associated with this particular article of clothing.

I trotted down the stairs happily; knowing that Jake would be here soon to pick me up, I tried not to think about how quickly our relationship was changing, how much more I depended on him and how much I missed him when we were apart. I wandered through the kitchen my mind of in another world, but my brain shut down when I saw a flash of fiery red hair in my peripheral vision, I whirled around, my heart beating unnaturally fast my breath caught in my throat all the colour drained from my face.

Victoria.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi everyone this is Lila, I just want to say thanks so much for reading my story, I hope your all enjoying it, I am sorry that I keep living you with cliff hangers but I am trying to right fast and hopefully I am not driving you guys to insane. **

**Thanks to everyone who has reviewed, alerted and favourited (not that, that is a word) my piece this is the first time anyone has ever read anything I have written so it means a lot. **

**I love Jake and Bella and wish they could have been together. **

**Thanks for reading xx**

**p.s sorry if the fight scene isn't very good I never know how to right them.**

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Jacob.

I closed my eyes as I ran, I knew my way around this area better than anyone, and I cursed every god I could think of when I realised that the leech was at Bella's house. My hole body shook and I wondered if it was possible for me to phase _again_. My heightened senses picked up Bella's scent seconds before my brothers did and Charlie's house come into view. My heart quiet literally stopped beating, as I heard an ear splitting crash and the sound of breaking glass, I rounded the bend of the forest in a second and sore Bella Swan on the ground, there was glass everywhere and she had a deep cut along her forehead, but more importantly she wasn't moving. I felt like I was going to vomit and I didn't think I could move until I saw her. The vile blood sucker, her red hair blue in the wind and I could see her spine stiffen at the smell of Bella's blood, I charged forward and tackled her. Throwing her hard into the ground, Sam and Paul were close behind me and I could hear Embry, Jarred and Quil's thoughts as they raced around the back of the house. I breathed a slight sigh of relief at Bella's secluded road, at least no humans would see the 6 giant wolves attacking the red-headed vampire well Bella Swan lay unmoving on the ground

Sam and Paul leapt at Victoria in unison, she smashed Paul away and he hit Charlie's mail box flattening it into the ground, Sam however was able to get his teeth into her arm, and he shook his head violently dethatching her hand which he threw towards the house it hit the a strut protruding from the broken window and bounced to the ground, were it began clawing its way back to the blood-suckers wrist.

Paul was back on his feet and as he lunged towards Victoria once more Quil, Jarred and Embry leapt through the shrubs and onto victorias back, I sprung forward with a growl my thoughts turned into an animalistic snarl, I needed to hurt this vampire because she had hurt Bella, my brothers thoughts mirrored my animalistic tendencies, this was the one time we could completely give into to our inner wolves. Only one voice was able to break through to me and make me see sense through all of the mental yelling and wolfish gibberish.

"_Jake, you have to get Bella out of here." _Sam yelled at me the alpha tone filled his voice.

Suddenly there was a loud howl from miles away, the sound was coming from La Push but I didn't understand how, every member of our pack was here, fighting Victoria.

"_Someone's just phased."_

"_who"_

"_how" _

"_Why"_

"_Everyone SHUTUP" Sam yelled his voice distinguishable by the alpha tone. _

"_HELP ME!" _two things were certain this new wolf was in mental pain more so than the rest of us had been, and secondly she was a girl.

"_Leah?"_ Seth, who was hiding in the nearby forest watching and waiting, asked quickly confused.

Images flew through my head, as I knew they were everyone else's. Harry Clearwater lying motion less on a hospital gurney a mask over his face and iv drips and wires everywhere. Sue Clearwater's, grief stricken eyes made her face almost unrecognizable. And then the sound that made each and everyone of us flinch the unmistakable sound of a heart monitor flat lining.

"DAD!" Seth screamed as he raced back towards La Push, the images continued, and I saw the asphalt ground, far away from where I really was, begin to shake, as Leah remember bursting forth into a great wolf in the deserted parking lot of La Push General Hospital.

Not even a second had passed and if it had been another time; and I couldn't hear Bella's fragile heart beating inside her unconscious body or if Harry Clearwater wasn't dead. And if I wasn't standing between my connection to life and a crazed ravenous vampire, I may have found it amazing how quickly our thoughts could travel and how easily we understood each other, but not today, today all those things were true, and I was desperately clinging to my sanity in the middle of it all.

In our split second of distraction Victoria was streaking past me. Her fiery orange hair was a blur, and her scent ripped through me. I had never felt so much hatred consume me in all of my life. She was using our moment of grief against us, her inhumanness was her greatest weapon as I realised there was nothing or no one she cared for and so the concept of loss or love were completely redundant.

I lunged after her, the ferocity of grief and anger worked in my favour, the blood-sucker picked Bella of the ground roughly and tried to run, she would want to enjoy the taste of her blood uninterrupted, and she knew she couldn't kill us all, I felt sick at the thought. Everything felt like it was in slow motion, probably from the adrenaline, and I could feel that Sam was by my side as was Paul. Victoria raced down the blacktop, I knew I couldn't get in front of her, but I couldn't attack her, not while she was holding Bella. However Sam apparently _could._

He leapt through the air his paws came down hard on Victoria's shoulders, she spilled Bella from her arms and Sam and Paul had her pinned on the ground. Time snapped back into its normal constraints and Bella hit the hard ground and I heard the agonizing crack of a bone breaking.

"Jacob get her outta her know. Phase out and run her to the hospital." Sam used the double alpha tone and his voice was distracted as he struggled to keep the struggling vampire on the ground as the rest of the pack tore her to shreds.

I didn't need telling twice I phased out immediately and pulled my shorts on hastily, Bella was beat up pretty bad, but she was in better shape than I was expecting, it was her arm that had broken on the impact with the hard tarmac, she wasn't conscious, and her hair was mattered with blood, however she had been worse, I had seen it.

"Its gonna be ok Bella." I whispered as the wind flew past us and I ran faster and harder than I ever had before.

"Somebody help her!" I yelled alarming the people closest to me. we must have looked like quiet a sight, me shirtless and 6 and a half feet tall carrying bella tiny pale form in my arms, I however didn't care. My 108 degree temperature was doing nothing to warm her and she was shaking violently in my arms.

"What happened." A doctor as quickly as he ran towards bella, shining a torch I her closed eyes.

"Car crash." I answered not attempting to shield the pain in my voice, I had come up with the story on the way here, It would also explain the wrecked front house to Charlie.

"The car lost control went through her front window." I winced and Bella continued shaking in my arms.

A nurse wheeled a gurney towards me and I lay Bella down carefully trying not to knock her arm or head.

"Female. 18. Isabella Swan, prep her for a full body scan, we need to see if there is any internal damage, get her on an IV drip and she's gonna need some blood." The doctor ordered as a second nurse came and wheeled Bella towards the doors, I tried to follow but the doctor took my shoulder.

"Is there someone you can call for her?" the doctor asked me.

"No, not right now." I said my voice was barely more than a whisper.

The doctor raised his eyebrows expecting an explanation.

"About 2 hours ago, her dad's best friend had a heart attack, and died I can not and will not tell him that his daughter, who is his only family is in the hospital. Now I need to be with her." My tone picked up and acid filled my voice.

The doctor gave me a sad smile and nodded, "you will have to wait outside the room while she has scans."

I nodded and pushed through the door after Bella. The wall was made of plexus glass and I could see her and hear her, her breathing was laboured and shallow I felt my body shake, as I looked at her broken and unconscious I took a shaky breath and closed my eyes leaning my head again the window.


	4. Chapter 4

Hi, thank you for everyone who reviewed I was so excited to get them, I hope you enjoy this chapter. and please keep reading and reviewing . xx Lila

disclaimer: i do not own twilight or any characters mentioned etc etc.

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Bella

_I tried to scream but the darkness was to much now and I felt my self sleep beneath the crushing darkness. _

Oh god was I dead. oh crap how could I die, what about Charlie what about Jacob, oh god Jake.

"_NO NO NO"_ I screamed mentally, "_I have to live, I have to I have to tell Jake._" I screamed my fist balled up and I tried to scream, but I knew that was no one listening, it was dark, and I felt too much pain.

"_Wait, no pain is good, pain means I am still alive, oh please, please let the pain be enough to keep me here." _

This wasn't like the last time, there was no burning, and I couldn't feel my blood draining away. This time, I was cold freezing cold, and my arm was throbbing sickeningly, the throbbing pain I did recognize. I wasn't sure were I was, or if I was even Bella anymore, the pain was the only thing I could feel, everything was black and everything felt fuzzy, my thoughts however were crystal clear. The pain was good the pain reminded me that I was still alive, in some way. I just had to break through, the darkness that crushed me, it restricted my lungs and I felt like I was lying beneath tonnes of bricks. I tried to concentrate on each part of my body, my head it throbbed externally but my thoughts were clear, I could feel the whip lash in my neck and shoulders, my right arm was throbbing numbly the other was…warm, yes my left hand was definitely warmer that the rest of my body, I frowned mentally until it clicked. Jacob, My Jacob.

"Ja..ke." the whispered murmur took a lot of strength but I could hear my voice, and I knew he could to. He squeezed my hand and I concentrated all my energy on his voice.

"Bella, Bells honey, I am right here please Bella open your eyes." He begged, his voice was so full of worry, I needed to respond some how I tried to open my eyes but they felt glued shut my hands were like lead, so I sucked in a breath.

"Jake" I groaned again, exhaling, it was more eloquent and I felt Jacobs warm lips against my knuckles, and my eyes fluttered open to see his deep ebony iris's staring back at me, suddenly everything made sense., all the feelings I had been fighting and denying came to me in three simple words. I Loved Him.

As I looked up into his eyes and he grinned at me, "yeah Bells it's me I'm right here." He whispered a small laugh in his relieved tone.

"w-what happened." I asked hoarsely.

Jake took a shaky breath, "Victoria was there at your house she slipped through us somehow and, and she threw you out the window." his beautiful face was contorted with pain and disappointment.

"Then we were fighting her and Leah, she phased in."

"Wait what Leah…Clearwater?" I asked shocked and confused.

"Let me finish?" he asked letting me decided weather or not I was ready to here the rest, I nodded silently and he continued.

"Yes Leah Clearwater, Seth's 19 year old sister phased. She was at the hospital, Harry Clearwater had a heartache this afternoon." He paused as he sore my expression change; he shook his head solemnly in answer to my unspoken question. My good hand flew to my mouth, and tears spilled over, Jake gently whipped them away.

"Shh bells honey, shh." He soothed me brushing his fingers through my hair softly.

"Do you want to hear the rest?" he asked and once again I nodded, bitting my lip.

"We were all pretty freaked by Leah phasing in, and then the news about harry and the leech she, she tried to run off with you. Sam, Paul and I chased her down your street, she didn't get far Sam sprung on her back, but she dropped you and your, your arm it b-broke." Jake offered his words were shaky he lay his head against my bed his hole body shaking, I lifted an IV taped hand and placed It on top of his head, brushing through his silky black hair, the shaking stopped quickly and he raised his head.

"Is that all?" I whispered still stroking his hair, Jake lifted his head to stare at me.

"What do you mean is that all?, your in here with a broken arm bruises everywhere and 8 stitches in your hear, what do you mean is that all." Jake was baffled, there was so much pain in his voice that I had to fight back more tears.

"But no one else got hurt, I mean everyone else is ok now, she didn't hurt anyone else, everyone is ok except.. h-harry." My voice broke and the tears I was fighting welled over. Jake just starred at me, there were to many emotions I didn't understand flashing through his eyes.

"I was so scared I was going to loose you" was all he said, letting his head dropped back to the side of my bed, the pain in his voice echoed through me, and I fought hard to keep my breath steady and my head focused.

"Hey Jake, I'm here." I said softly words and thoughts were becoming clearer know, my head despite the cut on my scalp felt normal again, and as far as the busies were concerned, I had, had worse.

Jake looked at me again; the look in his eyes was something I couldn't comprehend.

"I'm not going anywhere, I promise." I whispered hoping he would understand the double meaning in my words, he opened his mouth to speak but we were interrupted by a high pitched beeping sound, Jake's eyes flashed around in horror, as a stout nurse with short red hair bustled into the room.

"ahh don't worry dear its just your IV." She said soothingly, I think more to Jake than myself. As she spoke a second person entered the room, I recognized him as Dr Snow.

"Well Bella, how are you feeling?" he asked kindly taking my chart and flipping through it.

"Fine," I said truthfully putting a little extra enthusiasm in my voice for Jacob's sake.

"Well it looks like you were extremely lucky." He continued with a smile, I sore Jake shuddered if anything I was extremely unlucky.

"You suffered a mild concussion but the sleep and IV drip have cleared that up, you may need to take some something for the pain later this evening. " he suggested and I nodded, "now you arm." He continued walking over to examine the fresh white cast covering my wrist and lower arm. You broke two bones in you wrist, they had to be re-set so we will need you to come back in a weeks time so we can assess there recovery." Doctor Snow finished mater-o-factly.

"So that's it, she can go home just like that." Jake asked bluntly.

Dr Snow looked at him for a moment he smiled at Jacob and nodded. "Yes, none of the injuries Bella's sustained will require overnight surveillance, unless of course she feels that she needs to be here" Dr Snow paused for a minute, and I shook my head quickly trying to ignore the stiffness in my neck.

"I would like for you to take two Tylenol before you go to bed tonight, and when you wake up Bella." He added, I nodded lightly.

"I would strongly advise you inform Charlie, or anyone else who is staying at your house, of your concussion and they may want to check on you every 2 to 3 hours." Dr Snow added with a final nod in Jacob's direction.

"Thank-you Dr Snow." I offered and he smiled before leaving the room. The remaining nurse set to removing my IV drip, and disconnecting the wires.

"We will just need you to sign out when you ready Ms Swan." The nurse smiled before leaving.

The words bubbled to my lips, as I looked up into Jacobs eyes, I bit my tongue wondering how to explain my epiphany to him

. "I am staying at your house tonight." Jake said confidently, interrupting my thoughts.

"Jake you don't have to." I started but he silenced me with pleading eyes.

"Please bells just.." he trailed of and I nodded.

I sat up properly and pushed the thin hospital blanket back, as I stood up I felt a familiar wave of vertigo hit and I swayed were I stood, Jacob's strong arms caught me and he looked at me with nervous eyes, I grinned at him as my head cleared, and began untying the hospital gown I was wearing over my jeans. I peeled the mint green gown of my bruised shoulders, before I realised they were completely bare, I looked down at my scratched stomach to see nothing but my lacy purple bra, jakes eyes grew wide and blood rushed to my face.

"H-here." Jake offered unzipping his athletic jacket and handing it to me, I smiled at him embarrassed as I took the jacket from him, my embarrassment however was further fuelled by my inability to pull his jacket over my right, cast covered, arm he grinned, my favourite smile, at me as he gently guided my arms through the sleeve.

Outside it was dark, I shivered against the bitter wind that ripped through my hair, as Jake and I left the fluorescent lights of Forks Hospital, Jacob noticed my shivers and gently pulled me into his side, rapping his arm around my stiff shoulders. I relaxed into his side and wondered how on earth we were going to get home.

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Did you like it.

Please PLease Please Review


	5. Chapter 5

So here is the new chapter. hope you all enjoy it PLEASE PLEASE PELASE review. because you guys and your reviews inspire me to right more.

oh and p.s thoughts are in _italics_

_L_

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Jacob.

We drove home in silence; I desperately wanted and needed to know what she was thinking. She hadn't protested as I had slipped into the driver's seat of her truck, granted the broken arm was going to give her some driving issues, especially as she couldn't put a sweatshirt on properly. As soon as I had started the engine up she nestled herself into my 108 degree side, I wrapped my free arm around her shoulders. She sighed into my side and I smiled a little despite the mixture of sadness, confusion and guilt that was surging through me. The trip home to Charlie's didn't take very long and before I was completely aware of it we were pulling into Bella's street, she looked up at me suddenly, panic clear in her dark eyes.

"Charlie." she gasped frantically.

"I called him from the hospital," I soothed,

"He doesn't know the whole story, he just knows that you got hurt, he yelled for a wheel and spoke to the doctors, he wants you to call him soon, he needed to stay and make arrangements with sue.." I explained, trying to keep the anger and pain from my voice.

"We, we should go inside," Bella said after a moment her voice was shaky, and I cringed as she tried to open the door with her cast ridden arm. I jumped out of the passenger seat and speed to her door, she didn't look frightened or awed at my speed and then I realised with a shudder that the bloodsucker would have been as fast as me, if not faster.

I took her cold hand in my own, feeling the goose bumps along her wrist as I pulled her up the stairs and inside.

"Jake, please talk to me." she begged a slight hint of hysteria in her voice. My eyes shifted to meet hers, and I squeezed her hand in mine, I wanted to pull her into my arms but I was too afraid that it would hurt her further.

"Your always saving me." she whispered dropping her eyes. My head spun of imagining all the different connotations those small words could have.

_Snap outta it Jake, you know how she feel, she's told you enough. _

I dropped my head to look into her captivating dark eyes not realising how close she was to me, she blinked once her eyelashes brushing against her slightly pink cheeks. I was leaning against the kitchen bench so our heights were much closer than usual. It took every ounce of strength in me to keep from pulling her into my arms, and kissing her.

"I will _always_ protect you Bella." I whispered, her dark eyes darted to mine; she locked onto them like she was searching for a lie in my eyes, as if I was deceiving her, as if I would leave her…like the leech had.

"Bella, I swear on everything I hold dear that, I. Will. Never. Leave. You." my words were solid with conviction and I could see in her eyes she was beginning to trust again, not me so much as the promises I was making to her.

"That's what _he_ said" Bella argued weakly, and although I know she was only trying o protect herself from more unyielding heartbreak, her words still cut at me like daggers.

"I'm. Not. Him." I breathed trying hard to control the tremors beneath my skin.

She stepped forward, defying everything her instincts would have been screaming at her, diminishing the gap between us. She placed her small, slightly clammy, hand upon my chest, just beneath my throat, calming me in an instant. Was she aware of the sheer power she had over me?

"I know." She whispered her eyes locking back onto mine and her sweet scent crashed over me. Her gaze softened but she didn't look away, I wondered if my emotions were present on my face because a small shy smile was tugging at the corner of her perfect pink lips, I leaned down towards her, my face millimetres from hers, but she didn't pull back nor did she break my gaze, for a fleeting moment it felt like we were playing chicken, like she was daring me to go on.

In my moment of hesitation, her eyes disappeared behind ivory lids, I seized my lone opportunity, brushing my lips slowly across hers. I pulled away slightly trying to gage her reaction, my lips burned painlessly, her eyes were wide and confused but they showed neither anger nor resentment.

"What, what was that?" she asked and I cringed a little, ok so maybe she was mad, although she didn't sound angry….

"I-I love you Bells."

_What the hell man, why would you say that tow her right now she is gonna flip out, you stupid, stupid idiot. _

Bella stood still her eyes had dropped from mine again, but this time I was too afraid of her imminent rejection to pull her eyes up. She moved quickly, throwing her battered arms around my neck, her heavy cast clubbed me in the back of the head, it should have hurt but I couldn't feel anything except the girl who I was holding. She buried her face in my neck.

"Bells, can you talk to me." I murmured after a while, hating myself for disturbing the moment, but desperate to understand what she was thinking and feeling.

"You, you love me" she whispered to herself more than me, her eyes darting from my face again, it was maddening, she blinked her eyes returning to me and I sore a fresh set of tears glistening in her eyes, she nuzzled into my shoulder once more and I could feel her lips on my neck.

"I…." she began but my entire body went rigid as the painfully sweet smell filled my senses.

_NO, NO, NO! You stupid heartless, soulless leeches. NO! Hideous vile bloodsuckers. _

"Jake, what is it?" she asked panic and hysteria taking over her voice, her eyes were flashing around the room wildly. I pulled her, a little roughly, behind me pressing her against the kitchen bench and turned to face the entry to the kitchen, where the familiar yet unpeaceable scent was coming from, a low shudder rolled down my spine.

"Vampire." I answered trying to keep the snarl from my voice.

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ok so a wee bit of a cliff hanger there (sorry) the next chapter is half done so it shall be up really soon.

so who do you think the vampire is going to be hmm?

Please review and tell me your thoughts.

L


	6. You Unbelievable Wimp

Hello Lovelies, ok so here is the next chapter 'You Unbelievable Wimp' (i have decided to give my chapters titles, its just more fun) ... anyway. i hope you all enjoy it PLEASE REVIEW they make me so happy and i write WAY faster when i get them soooo R&R please

Love

L

* * *

_SAY IT! Spit it out Bella you unbelievable wimp, three little words just spit it out!_

"I.."

"Jake what is it." I asked suddenly sidetracked as a low shudder rolled down Jacob's now rigid spine. My eyes darted around the room, trying to understand what the threat was, except in the pit of my stomach I knew _exactly_ what it was. My breath flew from my lungs as Jacob spun me around pressing me against the kitchen cupboards, before assuming a defensive stance in front of me.

"Vampire." He snarled. My knees buckled beneath me and I slid down against the cupboards.

What I knew was only a second felt like hours as I watched another huge tremor roll down Jake's shoulders, I pressed myself further against the cupboards, my hands clenched into fist my nails digging into my palm, I wanted to scream but I couldn't, I wanted to run but I knew they were both faster than me, I wanted to tell Jacob that I loved him while I had the chance. But I couldn't.

"Bella?" I heard the eerily familiar voice before I sore its owner.

I felt my fists unclenched a little and was glad to see that my nails hadn't drawn blood.

"A-Alice." I stuttered as the tiny pixie like vampire became visible in the doorway. I felt my knees shudder beneath me, as I tried to hold onto my sanity.

This couldn't be real. _She_ couldn't be real, for months I had held on to the fleeting hope that one day anyone of them would come back for some reason, any reason. But that hope had faded now, it had been too long, too much had happened for Alice Cullen to be standing here in my kitchen.

"How are yo… I saw Victoria… She, she killed you." Jacob snarled at Alice's words, but she didn't seem to notice.

"I saw her, I saw her throw you out that window." Alice said gesturing wildly towards the shattered window, I winced at the memory of the breaking glass, I could see the confusion in her eyes as she looked at my very much alive self.

"She threw you though it and then you, you disappeared, I thought you were…"

"Dead." Jake spat, his tone was menacing. Alice let out a brutal snarl as her eyes focused on Jacob; I had never seen Alice act like this before. In that moment she really _was_ a vampire. Jacob's shuddering was visible, I put my small hand against his back, it was the most my week limbs could offer, but he responded his shuddering was reduced to tiny shivers.

"shh Jake." I breathed softly, it was intended for his ears only but I knew Alice would have heard.

She let out a low hiss, and I looked up at her anger boiling in me.

Jake let out a terrifying growl, which ripped the air from my lungs in shock, he shudder violently beneath my hand.

"I'm Sorry Bella. I-I can't be here, I can't protect you anymore, not from _them_." Jake whispered his soft words became a snarl as he put emphasis on the word _them. _I felt my heart shudder a little as I caught a glimpse of the torment ripping through his sad dark eyes, Before he raced inhumanly fast out the door. My temper boiled over angrily, and somehow I mustered the strength to yell after him.

"FINE! Run back to SAM!" I screamed my anger crippling me as I slid down against the cupboards once more, my head in my hands.

"B-Bella." Alice said softly, I hadn't heard her move, of course, but suddenly she was only a foot away from me.

"H-How?... is it just you?" I asked hoping she would answer both questions.

"Yes, its just Me." she said softly

"W-Why?"

"Because Bella I thought you were dead. Which brings me to my earlier question how the hell aren't you?"

"J-Jake saved me." I whispered holding my angry and hurt tears at bay, I knew I was going to pieces but I needed to understand.

"Jake?" she asked her perfect eyebrows raised.

"Y-yes, Jake's my best friend" I said quietly trying not to let the other emotions, I felt for Jake, flow through into my shaky words.

"He saved me from Victoria, he fought her, he and his _brother. _ He…."

"THAT DOG IS YOUR FRIEND!" Alice shrieked over my explanation, her hands flying to her temples. "That's why I didn't see you, I can't see past their stench." She added muttering to her self.

"Don't call him that, Jacob and the others, they saved my life. Multiple times." I whispered angrily, my temper flaring again towards Alice this time, as I thought of all the different ways in which Jake really had saved me, a new pain rippled through my chest as I remembered the tortured look in his eyes.

"Bella, werewolves are not good company to keep." Alice said her voice was filled with anger and concern, probably for my sanity.

"And Blood-suckers are?" Jacob said dryly, I looked up through my teary eyes to see him standing in the doorway, his jaw was set, but he wasn't shaking,

"I thought you _couldn't_ protect me, aren't they your rules?" I asked angrily my voice was thick with implications of his orders and restrictions.

"Well maybe I don't care." Jake said his tone was harsh but I knew he had come back to be my Jacob, not Sam's I looked up into his eyes, he looked as if he was bracing himself, preparing for the worst, and I knew what the worst was... me.

"I can't break my promise, not again." He whispered his eyes pleading and his voice was soft and innocent, as I gazed up at him and it made me shudder as I was reminded of the 16-year-old boy he had once been, and not the burdened man he was forced to be now.

"Bella? You can't be serious?" Alice starred daggers at Jacob but her questions we directed at me.

"About what?" I sighed frustrated at everyone for being so cryptic with me.

"The _dog." _She scoffed, Jacob snarled.

"He's not safe Bella, it's a wonder you haven't been killed." Alice continued completely ignoring Jacob's presence, I opened my mouth to argue, but another snarl escaped Jake and I sore a tremor roll down his spine.

"See." Alice said matter-of-factly.

"Alice your right it is a wonder I haven't died." She smiled triumphantly but I wasn't finished.

"I am only here right now because Jacob and his pack have been protecting me, from Victoria _and_ Laurent." I added my voice small, and I could feel the wound in my head begin to throb, I knew I couldn't last much longer.

"Laurent?" Alice asked temporarily sidetracked.

"He came back for a favour to Victoria, he- he found me, while he was hunting." I shook my head slightly in an attempt to rid myself of the pain in my head as well as the frightening memory.

A small gasp escaped Alice's lips and a sad smile played at the corner of Jacob's lips.

"He's dead now. He never got back to the red headed leech. She found Bella on her own." Jakes voice was neither proud nor gloating, he sounded angry and disappointed, I wanted to comforted him, I need him to understand he escape wasn't _his_ fault.

"Are you sure he's safe?" Alice asked after a moment. Jacob let out a growl; it was a warning I could tell.

"Yes." I sighed begging to get irritated.

"Ok because I need to leave for a while, I _see_ anything with him here." she exclaimed, her tone filled with disappointment and exasperation.

"Are you going to come back?" I asked quickly a little desperation seeping through my voice, I sore pain flash through Jacobs eyes, the look alone made me want to be sick.

"Yes, I probably have some explaining to do." Alice smiled sadly.

Anger replaced the pain in Jacob's eyes. "Like hell you do." he snarled angrily.

She ignored his comment. "I will be back in about an hour Bella, are you sure you will be ok until then." Her eyes flashed towards Jacob for a moment and I felt an unfamiliar annoyance towards Alice bubble to the surface.

"Yes." I sighed again, knowing I was close to falling apart.

She was gone in an instant. I felt my knees shake once before they gave out collapsing me onto the floor. Jakes arms were around me in a second, holding me close to his chest, his big warm hand tangled in my hair I pressed my face against him allowing the calming warmth of his skin, to wash over me.

"Do you want me to carry you upstairs." He whispered his voice was soft and I could feel his warm breath again my hair.

"Can you just hold me for a while." I asked pleadingly, Jakes said nothing but his arms tightened carefully around me pulling me onto his lap, he was leaning against the kitchen benches so I closed my eyes, my head leaning against his shoulder.

"Thank-you Jake. For everything."

"Shh." He soothed, he could hear the strain in my voice. He hugged me into his chest, the warmth from his body soothing my strained muscles until my shivering subsided and I drifted into the first stages of sleep safe, for the time being, in Jake's arms.

"I'm so sorry Bella." He whispered almost inaudibly against my hair.

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P.S i need your thoughts on this. is the next chapter

A: Jake's POV on this chapter

B: Alice's POV after this chapter (when she leaves)

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I am kind of interested in doing both sides of this, Maybe Jakes POV for the next chapter so we now what's going on in that gorgeous head of his. and then have alice explain her stuff in the chapter after that LET ME NO YOUR THOUGHTS AS THEY WILL HAVE A SERIOUS EFFECT!

Lots of drama and Bella and Jacob to come but i NEED! your reviews PLEASE!

L


	7. You Unbelievable Wimp JPOV

_Ello Ello, _

_first of all i would like to thank everyone who reviewed, not only did you all make me very very happy but you also helped shape this chapter, it is the longest one yet and i hope you enjoy it. i don't think i have anything else important to say here, other than PLEASE keep reading and reviewing. sorry about the swearing, i felt it was necessary. _

_L_

_p.s all the stuff in italics (except this AN of course) is either memories, dreams, or thoughts. _

_R&R. _

* * *

_Jake_

"Bella"

_AHHH, Fuck no, she just got better you freaking leech, she was just learning to live again, I AM GONNA KILL YOU bloodsucker. _

My thoughts were bellowing through my head but I knew it was useless i knew _he, _the stupid horrendous leech who had broken the only girl I would ever love, wasn't here. Or at least he wasn't her in the house no there was only one vampire present in the swan house.

"Bella." The high pixie like voice broke the night silence like a bullet, I heard the breath rush from Bella's chest as she recognized the voice. The smallest one, the mind reader stepped out from the hallway, she was tiny no more than 5'4 and if she was alone I knew I could take care of her in a second, even with her predictive powers.

"A-Alice." Bella asked rhetorically.

A split-second of stunned and confused silence passed through the room, Alice's eyes flickered between Bella and I. Bella I knew wasn't looking at anyone, her gaze was concentrated on the linoleum patterned floor, and Me? I was watching the leech, waiting for her to make a move; I wasn't disappointed she quickly opened her mouth.

"How are yo… I saw Victoria… She, she killed you." I snarled at her, but she didn't seem to notice me.

"I saw her, she through you out the window." The leech stated, her words were blunt and clearly she hadn't thought how they would effect the reason we were both there. Bella winced, flinching visibly as I am sure she relieved the memory of Victoria's hands at her throat throwing her backwards through the window. I wanted to turn around and hold onto her, tell her that nothing would ever happen to her. But the damn leech prevented me from doing so, I had to watch her every move.

"I thought you were.." Alice continued and my anger boiled over.

"Dead." I spat angrily; Bella didn't neither further reminders of her latest very-near death experience. The leech snarled at me, her black eyes flashed with menace.

_. JACOB BLACK STOP! You can't phase not with Bella this close, think about what happened to Emily, don't do this you idiot. _

My thoughts began reeling desperately trying to calm myself down as a huge shudder rolled through me, how stupid of the leech to try and aggravate me, with Bella so close.

"Shh Jake." I heard her soft voice was shaky and barely audible, I felt her tiny hand press against my back, she was trying to calm me down.

The retched bloodsucker let out a feral hiss, and I felt the wolf in me fighting my resolve, I felt Bella's hand drop from my back as I let out a brutal snarl a huge shudder rolling down my spine.

_Come on Jake, just get outta there, your gonna hurt her, just GO. _

"I'm sorry Bella. I-I can't be here, I can't protect you anymore, not from_ them." _I whispered, trying to hold back a snarl. I gazed fleetingly at Bella. I wanted her to stop me, to send of the bloodsucker away, and to tell me she wanted _me_ more than them, but she didn't. The reality of her 'rejection', choosing the leeches whom had left her broken and in danger, hit me like a nothing else.

_So this is what it feels like, loosing everything. _

_It_ felt like nothing else, nothing could ever compare to this kind of pain, not the death of my mother, nor seeing Bella broken on the grass, nor the pain and sadness I felt through Leah and Sam, my own death would bring me less pain that this. There was nothing, no rhyme nor reason to it . I dropped my gaze, I couldn't let her see the torment blazing through me.

"I'll always love you Bells." I whispered inaudibly, as I turned and ran inhumanly fast out of the house. The front dor hadn't barely slammed shut when I kicked out of my shorts, and let the violent shaking take me.

I heard her beautiful voice scream after me, her tone was angry but I couldn't understand her properly like I was underwater her words were slurred together as she screamed angrily_._

"_FINE! Run back to Sam!" _

In my wolf form the pain was no different, I let out a whimper as I collapsed beneath the kitchen window, for the moment I was alone but I knew it wouldn't be long before someone, anyone phased in and discovered my torture. Thoughts flashed through my mind as I searched desperately for a way out.

"_the connection is stronger than anything you can imagine, no imprint has ever rejected her wolf." _ Sam's alpha voice echoed through my memory as he tried to convince me to tell Bella about the imprint.

"_Yes she always has a choice, he will be anything she wants him to be a friend, a brother or a lover she always gets a choice, but he will always be her prefect math, like he was made just for her, imprints they normaly end up together, sam and Emily jarred and kim….." _ I was sitting with Bella on first beach her fingers entwined in mine, her eyes searched my face as I explained the pull of imprinting and the undeniable connection between the wolf and his soul mate, my heart stammered as I worked hard to conceal out pre-decided fate from her.

The next images came surging through me from a mind that was not my own, it was my brothers and they were trying to help me.

_Bella sopping wet screaming through the rain, begging me for answers. _

_Bella jumping out of the truck and running to hug a tall dark haired, russet skinned boy...Me. _

_In my garage, the red and black motorbikes were half done, Bella was laughing happily for the first time in months I barked out a laugh a huge almost childish grin on my face. _

_Bella sitting on the couch agitated continuously dialing the phone and hanging up quickly. _

_Two figures huddled close on first beach, one with long wavy dark hair that glinted red in the fleeting sunlight, the other much taller, with broad shoulders and cropped inky black hair, she rested her head on his shoulder. _

_STOP PLEASE! _I begged desperately my stomach heaving I was sure I was going to hurl.

The two minds went quiet suddenly, and I whimpered again alone with my thoughts and new memories to torment me, oh so I thought.

_Jacob. _Sam asked I should have none better than to believe they would leave me to my madness.

_Don't think like that Jacob, we are your bothers we are here for you. _

_I don't want you to be Sam, you cant help me here. No one can. _

_It will be ok Jacob.._

_HOW! Sam you don't even no what you're talking about, how the fuck can you say that everything will be ok?! Huh, you have Emily, why don't you just go home to her and leave me in peace. _I knew I was going to cop a hiding from him for that one, no one talks to the alpha like that, not even the 'beta'.

"_So you're like the beta?" she asked her hair blowing lightly in the cool March wind a small playful smile tugged at her lips. _

_I laughed my heart rate accelerating. "Only to you, I the my brothers heard that." I pretended to shudder "I would never hear the end of it." _

_I watched her through the corner of my eye, she was better, that was undeniable, but she still wasn't hole and my hatred for _them_ doubled. Her eyes darted towards me, catching me watching her, she looked away quickly her checks reddening but her eyes glinted in the sunlight and her lips curved up in a breathtaking smile. _

The memory vanished and pain coursed through me like a thousand knives I

_Because you are not in peace Jacob. _Sam murmured gently his voice filled with worry.

_Please Sam, just let me be for a little while, I will come home tonight. _I promised keeping my thoughts sincere.

_Ok Jake, but we will be phasing in, in about 30 minutes. Let us help you Jake, it hurts us to see out brother like this. _

I didn't have a chance to fight him on it because suddenly my head was very quiet, I was alone know.

I tried to block out all the other noise, the soft groan of the ancient floor boards as Bella and the leech moved around inside, the sound of the trees and the animals hidden in them, but mostly I tried to block out the beautiful, albeit shaky, voice of the girl I loved more than my own life, I watched the dark sky above me, so much had happened in one short day...

"THAT DOG IS YOUR FRIEND!" the little leech screamed yanking me from my self-inflicted isolation, anger coursed through me. The bloodsucker was angry at Bella? That wasn't right, it couldn't speak to Bella like that, not after everything they put her through.

I tried to relax, I let my mind go completely black, and inhaled, and as I released my breath I opened my human shorts and yanked my shorts back on. I was at the front door when I heard the little leech speak again; her concern was masked by anger.

"Bella, werewolves are not good company to keep."

"And bloodsuckers are?" I asked setting my jaw. Bella was on her feet leaning against the cupboard for support, her face was streaked with tears but when she saw me a tiny smile flickered across her face before her eyes flashed with anger.

"I thought you _couldn't_ protect me, aren't they your rules?" she demanded her resolve how ever was shaky.

"Well maybe I don't care." I spat back harshly, regretting it immediately, my gazed focused on her endless chocolate eyes, and I felt my face relax.

"I can't break my promise, not again." my voice cracked a little as I spoke in a whisper. Her entire face softened and I saw fresh tears roll down her beautiful cream cheeks.

"Bella? You can't be serious?" Alice asked and I could hear the implication in her voice, she was questioning Bella's sanity.

"About what?" A frustrated Bella asked sighing.

"The _dog_." She scoffed, I snarled.

"He's not safe Bella, it's a wonder you haven't been killed" the leech added, my fists clenched and I sucked in a breath trying to control the desperate need to phase. A snarl escaped my lips as I trembled exhaling.

"See." Alice smiled smugly.

"Alice your right it is a wonder I haven't died." The leech grinned gleefully; I felt my stomach lurch again, but Bella wasn't finished.

"I am only here right now because Jacob, and his pack have been protecting, from Victoria _and_ Laurent." Bella's voice was very small and I new she was trying to put on a brave face, I wanted and needed to help her in some way.

"Laurent?" Alice asked, distracted.

"He came back for a favour to Victoria, he-he found me, while he was hunting" I trembled a little at the memory and I sore Bella shake her head wincing, I wanted to hold her and make all her pain go away.

The leech gasped at Bella's whispered words, I felt a sad smile play at the corner of my lips.

"He's dead now. He never got back to the red headed leech. She found Bella on her own." Although my words were thick with implications, the disappointment and anger in my voice was undeniable.

"Are you sure he is safe?" the leech asked the questioned was directed at Bella, but she was watching me.

"Yes." She breathed irritated.

"Ok because I need to leave for a while, I can't _see_ anything with him here." She exclaimed, pressing her fingers to her temples as if trying to stifle a headache.

"Are you coming back?" Bella asked desperately and pain seared through me once more.

"Yes, I probably have some explaining to do." My anger boiled beneath my skin.

"he hell you do." I snarled angrily.

The leech ignored me. "I will be back in about an hour, are you sure you will be ok until then." Once again her eyes darted towards me.

"Yes." Bella sighed I needed the leech to leave now, Bella was going to pieces.

Bella had barely finished the words when the little bloodsucker was gone. Bella's knees gave out and I was with her on the floor in an instant. My arms wrapped around her cradling her against my chest. I held one hand against her hair as she pressed her face against me, I could feel her breathing begin to settle against my skin.

"Do you want me to carry you upstairs." I offered softly, my face buried in her dark her hair.

She shook he head a tiny bit. "Can you just hold me for a while." She asked me pleadingly, I didn't say anything, a sad smile broke across my face, and I tightened my hold on her, pulling her into my lap, being mindful of her head, arm and other bumps and bruises. As we sat on the linoleum floor of her kitchen I brushed my hands softly through her hair.

"Thank-you Jake. For everything." She whispered her voice thick, with the tears I knew she was trying to keep a bay.

"shh." I soothed hugging her to my chest after a little while her shivering subsided and I heard her breathing change, as she drifted towards sleep in my arms.

"I'm so sorry Bella." I whispered against her tangled hair.

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hope you enjoyed it, the next chapter is on its way so please review with any comments, queries or questions or suggestions you may have.

L


	8. Drive

Hello lovelies ,

firstly i am incredibley sorry that i didnt post this sooner, but A) i have been trying to get it right for about a week now, and B) well i just got lazy, however to make it up to you the next chapter is alomst finnished and should be up within 24 hours.

anyhoo i think this is my favourite chapter so far, and i hope you like it.

please please please review because they make me happy. also an enormous thank you to every one has review in the past i cant explain how much that means to be.

so without further a do.. Drive.

L

p.s the next chapter is drive in Jacob's perspective.

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_Bella_

_The halls were lit with flickering candles, my skirts billowed beneath me as I ran, faster and faster through my feat skipping easily over the loose stones, I heard the all two familiar words. _

"_Eyes look your last,  
Arms take your last embrace,  
And lips O you the doors to breath seal with a righteous kiss." _

_I stepped out of the hall into a room lit with thousands of candles, it was Juliet's tomb, Romeo uttered his final word and bent his bronze tousled head to kiss the lips of the girl he loved, exposing marble white skin, my heart leapt to my throat, I ran through the rows of candles, the dying couple payed me no notice. The beautiful strawberry blonde tresses of Juliet's hair was splayed across her death bed. Romeo looked up, his golden eyes flickered over me for a moment, but it was enough. The scene changed. I was standing in the meadow, our meadow my wet hair clung to my coat and my jeans were soaked through once again I was invisible to the couple, both grotesquely beautiful, skin like polished marble, the faceless girls her was honey blonde and ran bone straight down her back, his hair was a toffee coloured mess, he turned for an instant, and I saw his frightening black eyes, an unimaginable contrast against his alabaster skin, his gaze was dismiss but it filled with love as he look back towards his honey blonde partner. The scene dissolved and I stood in the darkening forest watching myself all those months ago._

"_And you memories?" I choked the words sticking in my throat. _

"_Well." he hesitated, "I wont forget buy my kind we're very easily distracted." He smiled and the scene evaporated to darkness. _

_All those months I had desperately tried to hold on, waiting for my Romeo to come back for me, and all that time I had been wrong. It wasn't Edward, no he was definitely Romeo, it was me, all that time I had been sure I was Juliet. Juliet who had lost her only love but I was wrong. _

_I wasn't Juliet. I was Rosaline. _

I felt Jakes arm tense around me and my eyes snapped open as I heard the screen door slam.

"Bella" Alice whispered her voice shock and she was on the floor.

"Alice, Alice What is it." I cried trying to free myself from the warm lock of Jacob's arms.

"Jake let me go!" I demanded struggling against him, his eyes flashed with rejection but he released me and I rushed to the tiny vampire huddled on my kitchen floor looking more vulnerable than I ever thought possible.

"ALICE! ALICE!" I yelled shaking her by her freezing stone shoulders.

She looked up at me her face grace her black eyes darted around the room unfocused and wild.

"Alice what is it, what do you see?" I asked my voice cracking a little, I recognized the dazed look in her wide eyes.

"Edward." She whispered. And I could feel the tremor roll through the floor as Jake leapt up from the linoleum floor trembling head to foot.

"I-I don't understand." I asked confused, as to why my breath _hadn't_ caught at the mention of his name.

"He is going to be within hearing range, he's going to see everyone's thoughts, my thoughts. He will see Victoria and he will see you dead." Alice whispered her voice was barely more than a whisper but her words were screaming in my ears, Jacob snarled loudly in the corner but the sound was muffled by the screaming in my ears.

"But, but that's ok you can just find him and explain." I mused quickly thinking up ways Alice could track him down. Alice however was shaking her head.

"Bella you don't understand, he's going to think your dead, he is going to Italy."

"No." I whispered and everything went black.

"Bella, Bella! Honey open your eyes." Jake's voice was clouded with pain and worry, I felt a sudden surge of anger at whoever had caused him that, I opened my eyes quickly only to find his infinite dark iris's starring into me. _I_ had caused him that pain.

"Twice in 24 hours bells really." He asked the worry retreating from his eyes.

"Sorry." I smiled for a moment and then everything caught up with me.

"Alice." I tried to turn to find her but she was next to me.

"Alice what's he doing? Were is he?"

"He's running, he caught Victoria's sent while he was in Alaska and he's chasing it, he will cross over Washington border soon. I can't tell where he is exactly because the forest is to dense, I will only be able to see once he decides exactly what to do." Alice explained her eyes only slightly in focus.

"Then he may decide not to go to the Volturi, he might decided just to ignore it, go back to Alaska." Something about Alaska, sparked images of strawberry blonde beauties to come forth but, I couldn't remember why.

"No, once he see's it, he will go that is concrete, he blames himself, I've seen that, of course at the moment I cant see anything properly." Alice said pointedly her eyes flashing towards Jacob.

"Uh-uh no way I am NOT leaving her _here_." Jake yelled.

"Jake pleases." I turned my tone begging it hurt him I could see the pain flash across his face.

"No, bells don't you remember he hurt you, so badly." Jake whispered hopelessly.

"Jake, he thinks I am dead, he is going to try and kill himself, I have to stop in, Alice you have to stop him." I said quickly just as I heard Alice small gasp, I dropped my gaze from Jacob's endless almost black iris's.

"Bella, I don't know how, I have no idea were he is, he has already made his decision, it is concrete he is getting on the next flight to Italy, we could.." Alice stopped short.

"What Alice! What is it please tell me, I'll do it." I begged I could almost feel Jacob's pain as I begged Alice, it caused my heart to cry out in anguish, but I was to crazed to properly understand why.

"Go after him, he won't believe me telling him now, but if he sees you, if he sees you he will know you're alive."

"Ok." I whisper my voice sounded unsure and I knew why._ Did I want to see Edward again? _

"Please tell me you have a passport, I don't have time to forge one right now." Alice demanded, her eyes hazy.

"yes." I croaked shakily moving towards the kitchen drawer.

Alice's disappeared up the stairs yelling about clothes and a toothbrush, I turned to see Jacob's 6,8 form standing over me, his eyes held emotions I had never seen in him before.

"Please Bella, don't do this." He said softly, vulnerably, I looked up at him and he wasn't the Beta to a pack of enormous mythical Wolf protectors, with a thousand and one burdens and responsibilities, he was my Jacob 17 years old, inky black hair, perfect russet skin and permanent oil stains on his cut off jeans, my heart faltered inside my chest at the look of vulnerability

"Jake, I have to go." I whispered dropping my gaze; I couldn't bare to hurting him, yet I was.

Alice flew back down the stairs a blur of white skin and cropped black hair.

"Bella quickly we don't have that much time, Edward he's on his way back to Alaska, to get a passport… he doesn't want to cause a scene before he gets to Italy, but he's running fast, Bella, very fast." She spoke so quickly I had to strain my ears to catch each word. Alice reached around Jacob, who flinched, she took my hand and pulled me steadily from the kitchen, my knees were shaky and my head was nothing but a painful a blur.

"Bella, _please"_ my breath caught in my throat and the tone of Jake's voice sent thick tears spilling from my eyes. He caught my hand as I reached to close the door of Carlisle's black Mercedes.

"Jake." I pleaded, not knowing what else to say.

"Please Bella, please stay, you don't have to go Bells really you don't. You could stay. You could stay here, alive, for Charlie…for me. Just please Bell's please don't go. I… love you Bella, and I no things have been difficult for a while, but please I will make it better, just don't leave, Me." each word cut through me like a knife. His hand circled my wrist and I bought it to my face pressing my lips against palm.

"I'm so sorry Jake." I whispered against his warm russet skin. I glanced up into his face for a miller second before squeezing my eyes shut and slamming the car door.

"Drive." I murmured to Alice who stepped flat onto the accelerator.

Above the sudden rev of the engine I heard Jacobs, very human, cry of pain. The sound stopped my heart, I gasped for air and the pain that overcame me was worse than anything I thought I had experienced, it felt like the moment I had decided to leave Jacob my heart had frozen the blood running through my blood stopped cold, and I was nothing. Not even a second had passed, the speeding car had not yet pulled of my road, I squeezed my eyes tighter, and two words echoed loudly through my head "_I'm Rosaline"_. My eyes snapped open.

"ALICE STOP!"

"Alice beaked suddenly, thankfully we were at the corner of my street, a stop sign.

"Bella, what is it, what's wrong?"

"I-I can't g-g-go" I stuttered cascading down my checks my heart beat unevenly and I struggled for breath.

"No Bella, its ok we will get there in time, we can save Edward and then the two of you can figure it all out, you will be fine, but we need to go, quickly." Alice reasoned trying her foot edging closer to the accelerator.

I shook my head; my neck ached from the movement. "N-no. I-I need.. J-j-Jake." I whispered and Alice's face fell.

"You would risk Edwards life for a dog." Alice yelled. I felt a twinge of pain and remorse, but it was nothing compared to the heart stopping blood freezing aganoy ripping through my body.

"I'm sorry Bella, but I have to save my brother." She said and for a moment I was sure she was going to drive off. However I heard the unmistakable click of a car lock, and I swung the door open.

"Thank-you." I whispered before slamming the door behind me, not however before hearing Alice's whisper.

"Be happy Bella." She stepped on the accelerator once more.

Charlie house was on top of the a hill, my tired legs sprinted up the road my feet aching as they stuck again and again against the wet road, and it tried to steady my ragged breathing and stop the unbearable ache in my heart.

My breath stopped in my throat as my crying eyes found Jacob, standing in the middle of the road, thick water droplets dripping from his wet black hair, my knees shook at the anguished expression on his face, making his beautiful tanned features looked pained and his almost black eyes glinted with the slightly crazed look of a burning man.

"Jake." I cried, against the customary forks rain.

I ran to him throwing both my cast covered and good arm around his neck.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." I cried burrowing my face into his neck, it took him only a moment to respond his muscular arms wrapped around me crushing me to his chest.

"I couldn't do it Jake, I couldn't go." I pressing my lips against his neck, in teary butterfly kisses. Jake lifted me of the ground and I wrapped my legs around his waist.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry" I repeated over and over again, whilst holding his face between my hands, my lips pressing against his checks, eyes, nose, forehead, chin, jaw and finally his lips.

"I love you." I murmured against his quickly responding mouth.

He pulled my face back and stared directly into my glinting tear filled eyes, his black eyes were confused and questioning, he didn't believe me.

"I love you Jacob." I spoke a little louder my voice filled with indisputable conviction.

He smashed his mouth, somewhat gently, to mine and I responded moving my mouth against his scorching lips.

"Say it again." he whispered against my neck.

"I love you Jacob Black, I love you, I love you. I. Love. You." I whispered a tiny laugh in my voice, and not even the blinding April rain could hide Jacobs beautiful grin.

"I Love you Bella." He whispered pressing his s lips smoulderingly against mine once more.

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PLEASE REVIEW!


	9. Drive JPOV

Hi,

so here is drive in Jacob's perspective, i think i like it more than Bellas but that might just be me.

i have some of chapter 10 done but i want your input so PLEASE review and tell me what you want o happen.

i am only 16 and this is the first time people have publicly read my writing so feedback would be brilliant.

so i hope you enjoy it.

L

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**Disclaimer: opps i probably should have had more of these never the less: i do not own any part of twilight or its characters. **

_For My own Jacob whom i miss so much. xx L_

**

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Jacob **

_I don't care about how imperfect this moment is, I don't care that Alice 'freakin' Cullen is somewhere outside, I don't care that Bella doesn't love me back, well that's not true I care about that a rather effing lot, however right now all that matters is that she is here, safe and alive in my arms._

I leaned my head back against Charlie's kitchen cupboard thankful for the strange moment of serenity whilst it felt like the whole world was crumbling around us.

I watched her lips move wordlessly, her body shaking slightly in my too warm arms; she was dreaming that I knew for fact.

_Please let her not be dreaming of that damn bloodsucker, huh I didn't think it was possible for me to hate him more than I already did, but god after watching her reactions tonight, arghh, he's such and arghhh I cant even explain it. _

"I wa…. rong." Bella mumbled incoherently and my thoughts flew.

_What's wrong with her! Calm down Jake you idiot she sleep talking she always does. I know but normally her words are crystal clear, almost like she's talking._

I argued mentally with myself, as I sucked in a shaky breath waiting for her to speak again.

"I'm Rosaline." She whispered clearly.

_What?! who the hell is Rosaline? What does that even mean?_

I tightened my arms around Bella, instinctively as the screen door slammed and the almost incapacitating scent of vampire filled the room.

"Bella." The future-seeing leech whispered her voice was riddled with pain and she was suddenly huddled on the floor.

"Alice, Alice what is it." Bella cried struggling against my arms.

_Don't let her go Jacob! _My 'inner wolf' commanded.

"Jake let me go!" she demanded I recoiled and the simple rejection, doubled by that god-forsaken imprint, stung me like a thousand needles.

Bella leapt up from my lap, crouching on the floor next to the bloodsucker. I blocked my nose and sucked in a breath of air, it seared down my throat, and I tried hard to restrain the violent shaking coursing through my body.

"ALICE! ALICE!" Bella yelled shaking the leech in frustration.

It looked up at Bella her eyes glazed over as if she had been day dreaming, her creepy eyes darted around the room like a frog watching a fly, my hands balled up into fists as I gulped in another breath of air.

"Alice what is it, why do you see." Bella demanded her voice cracked I wanted nothing more than to pull her against my chest, but I couldn't move. The vamp had seen something, something that was coming, something bad.

"Edward." She whispered, I froze for a moment and suppressed a brutal snarl as a huge tremor rolled through my body and I threw my self from the kitchen my vision turning red and hazy as another tremor rolled violently down my spine.

_Hold it together Jake, Bella needs you as a human, not some crazy wolf trying to tear chunks off of her ….f-friend. _

"I-I don't understand." Bella whispered confused, her heartbeat wasn't irregular and her breathing was calm, I had never seen Bella react calmly to the mention of _any_ Cullen least of all _him_.

The red spots began to disappear and my trembling was reduced to mild shakes, as I thought of Bella's steady heart beat at the mention of _his_ name. I knew I was reading too much into a simple reaction but it was all I had, and I clung to it like a life raft.

"He is going to be within hearing distance." _and my calm resolve is gone_ I thought spitefully as another tremble ripped through me and red spots began reappearing as my anger boiled.

"He's going to see everyone' thoughts, my thoughts. He will see Victoria and he will see you dead." The little leech continued, I growled from the hall way, as Bella spoke, her voice calming my ragging anger.

"But, but that's ok you can just find him and explain." She mused and I found myself nodding.

"Bella you don't understand, he's going to think your dead, he is going to Italy." The leech hadn't even finished speaking and I was running back into the kitchen, my anger and shaking were completely gone, and I caught Bella's unconscious form, before she had even started to sway.

"H-how did you..?" the little bloodsucker asked incredulous.

"it's a wolf thing." I snarled trying to hide the imprint from her.

"no," she shook her head.

"I have seen your kind before, you are very fast, but not that fast, you knew she was going to collapse before I had finished speaking." _Damn the leech knows her stuff_

I didn't answer her, I lay Bella gently against the linoleum floor, and brushed her hair back from her face, I had seen her unconscious too many times, and knew she would come around in a second, it didn't however qualm the fear shooting through me, it was a feeling that hadn't left my side all day.

"Bella honey, Bells." I whispered gently, once again trying to hide my blatant adoration, of the unconscious girl, from the bloodsucker.

"You must be joking." The leech hissed disbelievingly .

"_Imprinting_ really? isn't that just supposed to be some stupid myth?" The little leech asked, and I felt a small shudder travel across my shoulders.

"What like vampires are." I seethed.

"Why haven't you told her?" she said ignoring my pathetic jibe.

"Are you honestly that afraid of her rejecting you. Or" her eyes danced on the word. "Do you know as well as I do that if Edward showed up right now, she wouldn't even give you the time of day." Her words burned me and I tried to block her out, focusing only on Bella.

"Bella, Bella! Honey, open your eyes." I couldn't hide the pain and worry that had clouded my voice. She blinked slowly looking up at me, concern etched onto her face.

"Twice in 24 hours bells really." I asked trying to push the worry from my eyes so she wouldn't see right through me.

"Sorry." She said flashing me a small smile before her face clouded with confusion and worry once more.

"Alice." She asked quickly.

"Alice, what's he doing? Where is he?" _of course, Bella wants the leech, she wants him, _I thought hopelessly.

"He's running, he caught Victoria's sent while he was in Alaska and he's chasing it, he will cross over the Washington border soon. I can't tell where he is exactly because the forest is so dense, I will only be able to see once he decides exactly what he is going to do." She explained her eyes only slightly in focus.

"Then he may decide not to go to the Volturi, he might decided just to ignore it all and go back to Alaska." Bella added, and a small masochistic part of me could have sworn that she sounded hopeful at the prospect of Edward going back to Alaska.

"No. Once he see's it, he will go that is concrete, he'll blames himself, I've seen that. of course at the moment I cant see anything properly." The leech added accusingly, trowing her coal-black gaze towards me.

"Uh-uh no way I am NOT leaving her _here_." I said glaring back at the little bloodsucker.

"Jake, please." She was begging me. Begging me to…. Leave, I couldn't breath properly, it hurt too much and my heart faltered a little.

"No, Bells don't you remember he hurt you, so badly." I whispered desperately.

_I love you Bella, I love you more than that retched bloodsucker could, I would never ever leave you, choose me instead, love me instead Bella! _

"Jake, he thinks I am dead, he is going to try and kill himself, I have to stop him, Alice _you_ have to stop him." Bella said quickly she dropped her chocolate brown eyes, an I tried to Cox my heart into beating.

"Bella, I don't know how, I have no idea were he is, he has already made his decision, it is concrete he is getting on the next flight to Italy, we could…" She stopped short.

"What Alice! What is it please tell me, I'll do it." The desperation in her voice was more than I could bear, I leaned against the kitchen door for support.

"Go after him, chase him to Voltera if we have to. He won't believe me telling him that you're alive, however if he see you, if he sees you he will _know_ you're alive."

"Ok." She agreed in a whisper.

_NO! Bella please._

"Please tell me you have a passport, I don't have time to forge one right now." The leech demanded, her eyes glossing over, hazily.

"Yes." Bella croaked nodding stumbling towards a kitchen drawer.

I moved closer to her, opening and closing my mouth over and over again trying to figure out what to say, how I could make her see.

"Please Bella." I whispered my slight resolve completely melting. In that moment I was completely vulnerable, I was no longer the Beta-should-be-alpha werewolf, I was the 17 year old kid, who had been in love with Isabella Swan his entire life. I was hers, long before werewolf's, and 108 temperatures, vampire attacks and imprinting. She was my everything, I would always belong to her, even if she didn't know it, even if she wanted _E-Edward_ more.

"Jake," she hesitated. "I have to go." She finished dropping her gaze.

"Bella quickly we don't have that much time, Edward he's on his way back to Alaska, to get a passport… he doesn't want to cause a scene before he gets to Italy, but he's running fast, Bella, very fast." The leech called as she flew back down the stairs, my breath didn't catch in my throat, I was to far gone, when her icy marble arm almost brushed my skin as she grabbed Bella's arm dragging the girl I loved, more than anything, outside. It took me a millisecond to realise what was going on, she was leaving. My heart was breaking, oh lets face it my heart was already broken, but I couldn't give up not while I was still breathing.

"Bella _please" t_his time my breath _did_ catch I grabbed her door, and my dark eyes found the warmth of her chocolate brown irises.

"Jake." She murmured weakly.

_This is it Jake, just tell her you haven't got anything more to loose. _

"Please Bella, please stay, you don't have to go Bells really you don't. You could stay. You could stay here, alive, for Charlie…for me. Just please Bell's please don't go. I… love you Bella, and I no things have been difficult for a while, but please I will make it better, just don't leave, me." I watched her glistening tear filled eyes, she wanted to say something I know she did, but the leech tugged on her arm, I consider ripping of the car door but then Bella spoke.

"I'm so sorry Jake." She looked up at me once tears still cascading down her checks she squeezed her eyes closed and slammed the car door, the wheels screeched on the wet blacktop, and the Mercedes speed away.

_Ok so maybe you did. _

I dried reached, my hands on my shaking knees, I could feel my sanity slipping away, I didn't realise that I had cried out in anguish until the sound was echoing off of the trees, I couldn't hear the black Mercedes anymore. I couldn't hear anything, I couldn't feel the thick rain on my skin, nor the cuts and bruises I had sustained earlier today, as I sucked in a shaky breath, I couldn't understand how my heart was still beating.

All of a sudden a sound broke through my torturous solitude, a heartbeat, a shaky breath, and the smell of flowers and strawberries.

_No, no, no don't make me hallucinate please. I can't take this, be merciful just let me die instead. _ I thought desperately looking up at the beautiful hallucination my mind had decided to torture me with.

"Jake." She cried. _Why is _this_ Bella crying, if I have to suffer through this kind of pathetic madness she should be happy at least.. _

She ran towards me, sobs escaping her chest, and suddenly she though her cast ridden and good arms around my neck.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." She whispered burying her face in my neck.

_She's real. _

I wrapped my arms around her crushing her against my chest, she held my face between her small, hands, I kept my arms tight around her waist and lifted her from the ground, her legs wrapped themselves around my torso she was an inch taller than me like this, and she bent her face towards mine.

"I couldn't do it Jake, I couldn't go." She cried pressing her lips against my checks, eyes, nose, forehead, chin, jaw and finally after 10 years of waiting and 2 years of heart wrenching longing, she pressed her lips against mine. She let her arms slip back around my neck, I strained my neck up, pressing my face closer to hers, my lips moving against hers. She pulled back a fraction I felt her sweet breath wash over my face.

"I love you." she murmured, her lips brushing mine as she spoke.

I pulled back a little finding her warm chocolate eyes, her words lingering on the surface of my mind refusing to sink in, I had dreamt of Bella saying those words to me so many times, could it possibly be true this time, could the most wonderful, perfect and painstakingly beautiful girl be saying those words to _me_?

"I love you Jacob." She whispered, my heart soared higher than I ever thought possible, as incontestable conviction flooded her voice.

_Stop thinking and kiss her you idiot._

With a gasp or realisation, I smashed my lips against hers, Bella tightened her grip around my neck, her lips working harmoniously with mine, we broke apart after a moment both gasping for air.

"Say it again." I murmured my lips brushing against her neck.

"I love you Jacob Black, I love you, I love you. I. Love. You." she whispered a small laugh present in her voice. I couldn't help the huge grin that spread across my face, she blinked through the cool April rain, and her eyes lit up at my smile.

"I love you Bella." I whispered my lips finding hers, once more.

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Review please


	10. Go,Now

Hello , Hello.

sorry this has taken a while but this is a really long chapter. huge thanks so Aislynrose2010 who gave me some great suggestions which really made this chapter. anyway hope you enjoy and please please review with suggestions comments or otherwise.

xx L

Disclaimer: i do not own any part of twilight plot characters or otherwise.

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Jake

I breathed in gently and Bella's scent washed over me, I opened my eyes slowly feeling the huge stupid grin spread across my face. Her arms clung securely to my neck and her legs were wrapped around my torso, she was a little taller than me like this and her forehead rested against mine, when she exhaled her nose lightly brushed against my cheek and her chocolate eyes were hidden behind lavender lashes, she was the most beautiful creature I had ever scene, and she had chosen me. Her breath wasn't quiet steady yet, and my lips burned painlessly.

I heard a low "wolf whistle"from the edge of the trees beside Bella's house.

"I don't believe it." I muttered Bella's eyes snapped open they glistened with fresh tears.

"Nothing don't worry. Lets get you inside." I murmured my lips close to her ear; she nodded pressing her lips against my temple. But her head flashed up and this time I knew she had heard it to, she tensed in my arms.

_Jezz guys, cause her day hasn't been hard enough _I thought viciously, but Bella began to laugh, it was the best sound in my world. O_kay second best but until about 10 minutes ago it had been the number 1. _

"Go." She whispered with a beautiful smile, pressing her lips against mine, before slackening her hold on my neck.

Embry: earlier that night.

"Shit." I muttered trying to the sleep from my eyes as I started running from the house pulling of my t-shirt as I went.

"QUILL COME ON!" I screamed as I sprinted down the road ripping off my shorts, attaching them to my ankle strap.

"QUILL NOW!" I yelled again not hearing Quills footsteps behind, as I let the shakes take over my body and suddenly I was running on four legs.

_Sam what is it, is it the red bitch is she back?_ I thought a mixture of eagerness and worry coursed through me.

_No! _Sam thought simply, and suddenly the most horrific pain ripped through me, I phased out immediately, Dropping to my hands and knees I heaved on the ground beside me. I knew I had to phase back in but I was scared, scared of that sort of pain it was maddening. I took a shaky breath and closed my eyes, when I phased back in the pain was a dull roar, it was still more gut wrenching and unhinging than I had ever believed possible. a small part of me however was able to understand the fact that it wasn't my pain. It was…

_Jake _Quill finished my thought, his_ '_voice' horrified.

I watched the painful scenes play out in my head; Bella in the hospital, the little Cullen leech showing up at Charlie's, Bella unconscious on the ground, I felt the madness of jakes pain consuming me. It stopped abruptly.

_Sorry. _it was Sam.

_That pain, that that's Jake? _Quill asked, but we both new the answer to that question.

_Yes, he thinks Bella is going to leave with the leech, go back to her bloodsucker. We need to be there if … when she doe. No one has ever denied there imprint before, I'm not sure what will happen, but we all need to prepares ourselves. _Sam's tone was grave.

_Its all that fucking leeches fault, Bella isn't/wasn't the same around him she was a different person, it was like he was controlling her or something. _Jared voice was clouded, red with anger

_But Bella loves Jake, clear as day; if she knew about the damn imprint she would never knowingly do this to him. If Jake just grew a pair and told her she.. _Quills thoughts were reeling, every moment he had witnessed Bella and Jake together flashed in fast-forward across my 'eyes'

_Seth, go home._ Sam said suddenly. Seth had phased in so silently I didn't know he was there, only then did I register the pain and grief that was mine. Mine for Harry, mine for Seth and now Leah too. Sam's tone was not in his alpha voice; he couldn't use the alpha on Seth, not after today.

_No Sam I'm ok, Jakes my brother, he always has been, he needs us all. _I was a little awe struck at the kid, he was 15 and had just lost his dad; I never met mine and still couldn't think so maturely about it all.

_Thanks Em. _Seth thought sadly

_Damn it. _I hated the pack mind sometime, we all did.

_Come on, Jacob needs us._ Sam's murmured hopelessly, now I was afraid, if what I had experience before was the second hand version of Jacobs pain I don't know if I could see him like this, my best fried, my brother broken, in maddening irreconcilable pain.

_Cross the river and come around the back east corner of Charlie's house, we don't intervene with Jacob unless we have to, he doesn't know were here understand, _now the alpha tone was present in Sam's directions and we raced through the woods, I forced my mind to go blank whilst we ran and I found myself slowing my pace sooner than I expected.

The pain hit me like a tonne of bricks, but it was different to before the pain wasn't as strong and my thoughts reeled hopefully, Jake would be ok after all.

_No Em, _Sam's voice was grave once more_, what you felt before was second hand to how I found him phased early. We can sense his human pain right now._

_H-h-human, _Quill stuttered, _As in he is not even in wolf form right now, how…_Quill was horrified.

_With extreme emotions, generally centred on imprints or vampires, brothers can sense each other's emotions, but it is very rare, this is not a good sign for Jake. _

For the first time I could remember no one was thinking, we focused all our energy into trying to block out the voices from inside. It wasn't easy however.

"Please Bella." Jake begged and I felt a surge of anger pulse through me. Bella was going to destroy my best friend in the world, and although I knew it was unintentional and would hurt her too, no amount of liking her, and pulling for her and Jake could make me see past that.

_I know man, I know._ Quills thoughts were dejected.

Time passed painfully slowly, until I heard a car door slam, and I sprang up from my position on the forest floor. The pain crippled through me and I fell to my knees shuddering, no thoughts could enter my mind. Later I wondered how it was possible that Jake hadn't change, but Sam told us that under the force of the imprint he couldn't do anything to help himself, he was going to succumb to the madness.

What I knew for fact was only seconds dragged on for what seemed like hours.

_I don't know if Jake will be able to overcome this_. Sam thought as I felt madness creeping into the sorrow. Then suddenly it vanished.

I heard 5 minds gasp, shocked and confused, all at once.

_We have to get closer, remember he doesn't need to know were here._

We crept closer to the front of the trees we had a full view of the road now and my eyes almost bulged out of my head, there Jake was standing in the middle of the road, rain dripping down his back his arms limp at his sides. In a somewhat painful looking way a casted arm crashed into the back of his neck followed by a small pale hand, hidden beneath a too-long jacket sleeve.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." Bella sobbed as wet brown hair splayed out over Jakes shoulder.

"I couldn't do it Jake, I couldn't go." She cried covering his face in butterfly kisses, before capturing his lips, his arms finally reacted pulling her close to him and I felt that last vestiges of the madness slipping away. Bella's jean clad legs wrapped around Jake's torso; she looked taller than him now as he supported her weight, her dark hair falling down in a dark curtain. My brothers elated thoughts suddenly flooded my head we were whopping and behaving like absolute idiots, pretending we were just happy as we didn't have to endure any more of Jacob's constant obsessing. But we all knew our happiness ran deeper than that.

"Say it again." I heard Jake whisper, and I knew we had missed something; we all focused our attention on the couple on the road, attention rapt like it was a TV show.

"I love you Jacob Black, I love you, I love you. I. Love. You." Bella said a small laugh apparent in her voice. My mind erupted once more, and we didn't try to conceal the real reason for our happiness anymore, although we knew our elation would be nothing compared to Jakes.

"I love you Bella." I heard Jake whisper the words he had thought countless times aloud to the girl of his dreams.

_Its time to go now_ Sam voice murmured inside my head.

_No way Sam, Jake's just got the girl he has been pinning over for 2 years and you want us to leave! _Trust jarred to put up a fight, I knew at least Quill and I agreed with him.

_We should leave them alone_ Sam said half heartedly, I saw his eyes dart out of the trees were Jake was holding Bella, her forehead pressed against his, her expression hidden behind her wet hair.

A loud wolf whistle erupted from Quill's chest, I fought hard to hold back a laugh, I sore the muscles in Jake's back tense a little as the sound ripped through the silent night.

_Quill _Sam groaned, a laugh evident in his thoughts.

_Sorry Sam, it just slipped out, _Quill lied, unconvincingly

From the corner of my eye, I saw Bella nod and press her lips to Jake's forehead. With a mental nod to Quill, we turned our faces towards them and a loud wolfish howl emanated from the trees towards them.

Bella's head flashed up her dark locks falling away from her face, her muscles tensed as did Jacobs, but then she started to laugh and I sore his frame relax. For a moment I was envious of the strength the imprint created and how lucky Jake was to have imprinted on his best friend and the girl of his dreams, I was envious until of course I remembered the unbearable and maddening pain Jake had felt earlier, and was thankful for my un-imprint related fortune.

_Its not all bad Em _Sam's voice broke through my thoughts and I became privy to the wonderful images of Sam heavy-duty snogging Emily.

UH_H SAM! _I grumbled before I felt Sam's guilt and sheepishness spread through me.

_Sorry, you know how hard it is to control. _

I was about to respond to Sam's thoughts when Jake and Bella distracted me, her hands slipped from his neck and he steadied her onto the ground taking her hand in his.

"Go." She whispered with a beautiful smile, pressing her lips against mine, before slackening her hold on my neck.

"No." I replied stubbornly holding her closer.

"Yes." She laughed just as stubbornly, quickly covering my mouth with hers rendering me unable to speak, I had no choice but to comply, she didn't fight fair. She slipped down and I steadied her on the ground taking her hand and holding her close. I could feel the packs eyes on us as I guided Bella around the side of the house to her spacious backyard, and its thick rim of forest. There was a large rock set into the ground close to the house, Bella sat down hugging her knees to her chest, her eyes were still full of tears but she smiled up at me, I made a face and leaned in pressing my lips against my forehead, her hand move faster than I was expecting catching behind my neck and pulling me into her lips.

The pack whistled madly, and I made a mental note to pummel them a later, but that was about all my mind could handle because suddenly I felt Bella's to_n_gue trace lightly over my lips, this time she was deepening the kiss. Her lips parted and she exhaled into my mouth pulling away a wicked smile on her lips.

"Go, Now." She whispered but her hands clung to my shirt.

"I wont be far I promise." I whispered in her ears, pressing my lips against her check quickly before running back form her, my chest was already bear and I didn't want to have to run home for a pair of shorts.

"Close your eyes."

Bella pulled a face but squeezed her eyes closed and I quickly stripped off my shorts tying them to my ankle, a closing my own eyes as I felt my hole body shake and then stop suddenly, I padded quietly towards Bella I nudged her knee with my nose gently and her eyes fluttered open.

"Oh." Bella gasped her face blanched.

_Shit _I retracted my steps immediately, hanging my head in shame, I could hear my brothers excited voices ricocheting around my head, but all I could think was that I had scared Bella. She had seen me in my wolf form before, but never that close, and never after a day like today.

"Jake" my name came out as a whisper and I looked up immediately to see Bella standing a few feet from me, her left hand was outstretched a little and she stepped, albeit it, shakily towards me.

_Be careful Jake_ I heard Sam's warning echo through my strangely quiet brain, Sam probably ordered them all to shut it for a bit.

_Yeah I did _Sam chuckled mentally and then he too went silent.

I stepped tentatively foreword, Bella smiled reassuringly at _me_ stepping forward and running her hand through my hair.

_Crap,_ Sam thought suddenly.

_Huh?_ I asked distracted.

_First time Emily saw me up close she screamed, and fainted._

_Well what can I say Bells is good with weird. _A laugh in my voice.

"You should go be a wolf for a minute" Bella whispered against my fur. I didn't want to leave her yet at the same time I could almost feel Quill and Embry's desperation to speak, or more so yell. She stepped back a little keeping a hand in my fur, I liked her face , wolfishly and retreated a little.

"Eww Jake!" she yelled laughing as she whipped her face with my jacket sleeve.

_Sam you can un-alpha them now. _

I regretted my words almost immediately, as my head was suddenly filled with 5 yelling, whopping and swearing voices. I turned my head quickly to make sure Bella was safe on her rock before racing towards the edge of the forest, I however was a step behind as Quill and Embry came leaping from the trees tackling me in wolf form to the ground.

_Shit Jake, it took you long enough!_ Quill yelled.

_Yeah Jakey boy how long you been in love with Bells, huh? Glad it's finally worked itself out for you man, the leech was never good for her. _Embryrambled his front paws pinning me to the ground

I heard Bella laugh from her rock_. _

_Looks like your girl finds weakness appealing, lucky for you. _Jaredtoo came bounding from the trees, followed closely by Seth. I sore Sam leave the trees and lay his head on his paws a few feet in front of Bella, pretending to be merely watching us make fools of ourselves, I however new better, he was protecting her, just in case.

_Thanks _I _thought_ amongst the chaos of voices rushing through my head.

_No problem Jake, besides I could pin you any day of the week, wouldn't want you too embarrassed in front of Bella. _

_I'm gonna let that one slide Sam. _

_Ahh, good Ole Jakey Boy, give him the girl and you can get away with just about anything. _ Jarred teased leaping across my chest landing on the ground close to my head, Bella gasped loudly, her hand flew to her mouth stifling a scream; Jarred was going for a reaction. I pushed my brothers of me, I ran over to Bella trying to show her I was ok, as I got closer I realised her complexion was of, her normally creamy skin was almost translucent.

_You idiot Jake she's wearing soaking wet clothes in 50 degree weather, she must be freezing, get her inside NOW! _Sam reproached, but I knew he was reprimanding us both for not thinking about Bella's human temperature. Guilt surged through me. I made a show of closing my eyes to Bella and she understood squeezing her eyes shut as I phased out pulling on my shorts.

_Bella_

I squeezed my eyes closed tightly, my teeth chattering, I hadn't even realised just how cold I was until I felt Jake's feverishly warm arms wrap around me. I pressed myself close to him trying to warm myself.

"I'm so sorry Bells." He whispered and I could hear the guilt in his voice as he rushed me inside.

"f-for what?" I asked trying to stop my clench my teeth.

"Forgetting that you would get cold sitting out in the wind, it was so stupid." Jake rambled, I placed my finger against his lips.

"Hey, hey shush you, I don't mind getting a little cold, besides I have my own personal space heater right here." I added pressing my self closer against his chest my arms tight around his neck, he skilfully fetched a town from the linen cupboard whilst still holding me, and pushed my bedroom door open his foot.

"So some of these werewolf's things aren't to bad, huh Bells." He chuckled again his voice light again and it made me smile.

"I 'spose there not _too_ bad." I murmured pressing my lips against his temperate neck with a smile.

Jake sat me down on my bed, and handed me the clean fluffy tower, he kept his hands on my cold shoulders eyeing me intently.

"What?" I asked as Jacob starred intently at me.

"Are you alright?" he asked me concern flashing through his beautiful almost black eyes.

"I told you Jake, I'm f-f-fine its not that cold outside." I argued wanting him to smile and be happy again, distract me from the thoughts and emotions rampaging through my head.

"Not the cold, although I don't believe you by the way, in generally after today are you ok." Jakes voice dropped an octave and he pulled me closer towards him.

"I don't know," I whispered truthfully, burying my face, trying to subdue my shivers.

"Ok, first things first lets get you dry.

"I-I cant." I shook my head feeling stupid and useless.

My sopping clothes clung to my skin and my heavily casted right arm made it all the more difficult. Jake nodded, some how understanding my dilemma.

"Here." He whispered as he helped me wrap the thick warm towel across my chest, so it fell just above my knee, he sat me back down and took hold of the ankle of my jeans, if my face wasn't bright red and I wasn't feeling like a complete idiot I probably would have laughed as Jake quiet literally pulled my soaking jeans from my legs.

When the heavy denim was finally free from my legs, I tried to stand up, but the incredibly long and overly stressful day caught up with me and I sore the floor of my bedroom swirl towards me, before strong arms wrapped around me and sat me down once more Jake flashed me a benevolent smile.

"Where are your sweats?" Jake asked softly.

"Second draw," I replied slightly mortified that I couldn't even manage to find my own clothes, but mostly amazed at how wonderful Jacob was.

Thankfully I was able to pull the loose grey material up to my hips with one arm. Jakes jacket however was a different story. I managed to pull down the zipper, but couldn't free my arms from the now clingy wet sleeves. I looked up at Jake pleadingly, embarrassed tears welling in my eyes.

"Turn around." Jake whispered, he gently pulled/slid the jacket from my arms being extra careful of my awkward and heavy cast, Exposing my purple bra to Jake for the second time that night. I couldn't help but smile, when Jake finished helping me into my dark blue t-shirt, at how lucky I was to have Jacob who despite being a 17-year-old boy he was extremely gentlemanly.

"Thank-you, for everything." I whispered trying to put as much emotion into my words as possible.

He pressed his lips to my forehead. "Anytime Bells." He whispered.

Without complete conscious thought, my fingers stretched out and began tracing feather light lines along the contours of Jake's chest, I felt his shoulders shudder slightly under my touch, and u couldn't restrain the smile tugging at my lips . My fingers traced along his neck and he held my hand against his check kissing my palm.

"Jezz Bell's your sleep deprivation is seriously testing my restraint here" he whispered shaking his head wit a playful smile.

"Sorry." I whispered, this was the Jake I knew and loved.

"Come on." He whispered as he directed me down into my ridiculously comfortable, pulling the thick blankets close to me.

"Goodnight Bells." Jake whispered his lips pressing to my forehead again.

Jake. 

"Goodnight Bells." I whispered sadly as I pressed my lips lingered on her forehead.

"No" she murmured her eyes were already closed, but her grip was strong, well for Bella at least. Her small fingers twisted around the leg of my shorts, stopping me from moving.

"Stay, please. I need you to stay." She whispered.

_Oh thank god. _

I was by her side in a heartbeat, I sat above the blankets, my back against the wall behind me, She rolled over to look at me her breath-taking brown eyes half hidden behind her pale lids and long dark lashes she shivered despite the fresh clothes and multiple blankets she was wrapped in, I stretched out wrapping my arm around her.

"Thank you Jake." She whispered her eyes opening a little wider.

"For everything." She added with a little smile, tears welling in her eyes.

"I'll always be here bells I promise." I whispered as I tentatively ran my hand through her damp hair.

"Lie down" she whispered between her gradually slowing breaths, she was on the verge of sleep, I slid down so that my head rested on the pillows next to hers. As soon as I was settled she pressed herself closer to me, I couldn't contain my smile as her head fitting perfectly in the crook of my shoulder, my arm still wrapped around her. I watched her beautiful creamy face, feeling sick to the stomach as I took in the subtle bruising along her jaw and the deep gashed along her brow, she meet my eyes and I could see they were full of tears.

"Its ok Bells, you can cry now Baby, your safe I promise." I murmured my lips brushing against her semi-damp hair.

"I love you Jake." She whispered after a moment, and my heart leapt at the words.

"I love you too Bells"

_More than you could possibly know._

I was only able to watch Bella sleep for mere minutes before my own fatigue dragged me under.

"NO! Don't hurt him please." Bella cried out her voice riddled with pain, my eyes opened with a flash, it was dark but that didn't impede my heightened sense. Bella lay asleep in my arms tears splashing against my bare chest as she writhed a little in my arms.

"Please, no don't hurt him, hurt me instead please." She begged, I wanted to wake her up, to hold her close and tell her everything was ok, but I couldn't bring myself to do it, I knew who she was dreaming of. It was Edward.

_You idiot Jacob, you should have known that no matter how much Bella tells you she loves you, you would always be second to the leech. _My thoughts echoed spitefully around my head, but were interrupted by Bella's scream.

"NO! JACOB! NO please, Jake look at me, look at me. Jake please, no don't leave me you can't leave me. You promised me, I love you Jake. STAY WITH ME DON'T LEAVE ME! LOOK AT ME JAKE, PLEASE!" she screamed sobbing.

_ITS YOU!, she's dreaming of you, wake her up jakey boy, show her your ok. _

"Bella, Bella baby its ok its just a dream" I soothed shaking her gently.

"Bella wake up." With a gasp her eyes snapped open searching for me frantically in the dark.

"Jake?" she demanded quickly.

"Oh god, Jake I was, it was y-you were…" she trailed of heavy sobs echoing through her chest rendering her incapable of forming any more words.

"Shh baby its ok, I am here I'll always be here." I whispered.

"P-promise m-me that you'll, that you'll never l-leave m-m-me." she cried.

"I promise Bells." I vowed a little surprised she even had to ask.

"I'll never leave you." I added in a whisper kissing her teary cheek.

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Hope you liked it. now REVIEW please!


	11. Time to say goodbye

Hi, i am so sorry this has taken such a long time to finally make it up here, i made it a ridiculously long chapter to make up for it.

Pleas review and suggest your ideas.

thanks to Aislynnrose2010 for the wonderful suggestions- you should all check out her Leah and Sam its called "Leah's New Life of Hope."

disclaimer: i don't own twilight or anything.

anyway away we go with "Time to say goodbye"

REVIEW!

xx L

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"Gahh." I groaned squeezing my eyes tightly closed trying, in vain, to keep the bright grey light streaming from my window away. There was a tugging feeling in the pit of my stomach and I unwillingly opened my eyes.

"Ohh." I half sighed as I took in the shirtless Jacob lying next to me, the tips of his fingers were gently curled around the fingers of my casted arm. As I stared at the cast for a minute all of the previous days overly dramatic events came flooding back to me. Victoria, The window, Harry Clearwater, Alice, The Car and Jacob, my Jacob. I felt tears welling in my now very awake eyes, so much had happened; so much I wanted to just leave behind.

Everything hurt, now including my head, and I very much wanted to curl back up against Jacob and go back to sleep, but I knew that the real and mythical worlds were waiting right outside my door.

Careful not to wake Jacob, although I knew for a fact that he sleeps like the dead, I slipped from the warmth of Jakes arms, and padded on my tip toes out of my room, my good arm retching out to hold the door frame as a strong wave of vertigo hit me. Once the walls stopped moving I almost ran to the bathroom closing the door quietly behind me.

My reflection was worse than I was expecting, my hair was matted with what looked like blood, dirt and possible loose gravel, one eye was tinged purple in a bruise, and a deep gash ran along my hair line. I lifted my shirt and sore more gashes running down my back, but they looked worse than they were in reality, my arm however was definitely not a superficial wound. I fumbled through the Medicine cabinet desperately to find Tylenol. I soon realised that it would be impossible for me to attempt to clean myself up without at least going downstairs, and at the moment I had no alibi for there being; a broken window, a black eye, a broken arm a stitched up head, and a shirtless 17 year old werewolf in my bed, and I had sneaky suspicion that anyone of these things wouldn't exactly have gone down well with Charlie.

I settled for brushing my teeth and washing my face, I crept back along the landing I hated feeling so helpless. My door creaked as I gently pushed it open, I watched Jakes gently sleeping form, his feet lolling of the edge of my bed, his face was placid and innocent. I couldn't bring myself to wake him I slipped back underneath my covers, shivering a little until Jakes warm arms encompassed me and I felt his lips on my shoulder. So he wasn't asleep after all. I tried to twist in his arms, but pain shot through my arm sending a wave of nausea over me. My face must have expressed my pain because Jacob sat up quickly, holding me against his warm chest his hand rubbing small circles over my shoulder.

"Your arm?" Jake asked concern blatant across his handsome face.

I nodded tears completely unrelated to the pain of my arm springing in my eyes.

"What else." Jake whispered against my hair.

I wasn't at all surprised that Jake knew it was more than just my arm bothering me, as he had said on multiple occasions he knew me better than anyone, even myself most of the time.

"Everything's all messed up Jake, Harry's dead, I have no idea if Charlie even came home last night, I look half-dead, I cant even take a shower to fix it because my cast cant go underwater plus I cant dress myself properly, there is a massive Bella shaped hole in the side of Charlies house and its all my fault, I don't know what to do Jake." I ranted tears streaming down my checks as I inhaled quickly remembering to breathe.

Jake merely stared at me for a moment before offering me sad smile.

"Look at me." Jake whispered his dark eyes burrowed into mine. "As far as Harry's d-death goes no one can change that no matter how much we would like too." I felt a surge of guilt as I saw the dejected look cross Jakes face Harry had been a second or father to Jake, and my stupid big mouth had hurt him. I pressed my face into to his shoulder as he continued to speak.

"Charlie stayed at the Clearwater's last night along with my dad, he is going to come back around today to shower and get his suit for the funeral this afternoon." His voice cracked a little but he persisted on. "Sam told me Emily offered to come and help you get dressed and everything this morning, so we can call her as soon as you want, and the hole is already on the mend, Quill's uncle is a builder out on the Rez and is coming to fix it this morning. Bella I promised you that after a little while everything.." I cut him of my mouth crashing against his. His lips were hesitant at first, until I deepened the kiss and one of jakes hands found the small of my back holding me even closer to him, the other tangled in my dishevelled hair. I tried hard not to club him in the back of the head with my cast as I wrapped my arms around his neck, I sighed into his mouth and we broke apart both a little light headed and gulping down air.

"What was that for?" Jake grinned gasping a little.

"Because you thought of everything, and because I can do that whenever I want now." I whispered my lips at his ear.

"Yes, yes you can." Jake grinned, and his smile took all the pain and confusion of my life away for a brief blissful moment.

"W-what about…" jakes facial expression changed drastically, his eyes became darker and his features were nervous and worried.

"What about _him_?" Jake asked his voice low he wouldn't meet my eyes.

"Jake." I groaned, I didn't have the strength to do this. "Honestly Jake I don't know, right now it hurts to think about all of that." his expression fell and I held his face between my hands, ignoring the twinge of pain the movement pulsed through my wrist. "But I love you Jake, I chose you." I whispered making his eyes meet mine. He pressed his lips to mine and the warmth and passion of his lips overwhelmed me. His kisses were like nothing I had ever experience and nothing I could ever get sick of. With Jake there never had to be lines drawn or actions controlled we never had to stop for fear of my safety, and I knew that later when I wasn't so broken that would probably become a slight issue for both of us.

Emily arrived a little while later and she quiet literally forced Jake out of Charlie's house so he could run home to La Push to shower, change for the funeral and pick up his car.

"Jake." I heard Emily's cry of frustration from downstairs. " Its gonna take a while for Bella to shower and we have to get her dressed and everything as well. This is hard enough for her as it is without you being here to."

"Emily, you know I _can't_ leave." Jakes voice was very low and I wasn't sure if I heard him correctly.

"No, I know you don't _want_ to leave, but Jake at some point your gonna have to leave. Jacob I promise you that if you run back to La Push, shower and pick up some new clothes and drive back here you will be back before Bella is even dressed." Emily pleaded.

"Fine!" Jake groaned he met me as I was coming down the stairs.

"I'll be back soon I promise, I love you." Jake whispered kissing me quickly before disappearing back down the stairs before I had time to reply.

"Thank you Emily." I said softly as I sat at the kitchen table and Emily wrapped my arm in plastics bags to make sure it stayed dry.

"Don't mention it Bella. Besides it will be nice to have another 'wolf girl' around when things go back to our version of normal." Her voice broke a little, and I realised stupidly that Harry had been her uncle.

"I'm so sorry Emily." I whispered.

She smiled up at me her beautiful scared eyes were swimming with tears, "Thank-you. Its just Leah I am worried about, there isn't really anyone else on the reservation her age, Rachel and Rebecca have been gone for a while, and we don't talk much anymore not like we used to." Emily added sadly.

I didn't know what to say, but my silence was not unwelcomed by Emily, she smiled at me again.

"Like I said, it will be nice to have someone to talk too, that doesn't morph into a giant dog at will." Emily said with a small smile ripping off a strip of duct tape.

"Don't any of the other have… girlfriends?" I asked Emily feigning nonchalance, I wasn't used to the G-word yet, and somehow I knew it didn't fit Jake and me.

Emily shook her head, "No, none of the others, except Quill of course, have imprinted. And no one is wiling to risk It." something about her tone struck me as strange, it was almost as if she was worried she had said to much. My thoughts however were more concerned with the words themselves.

_Imprint_ there it was, and I felt like hitting myself for not thinking about it before. My stomach suddenly felt very queasy and I wanted to heave or cry or scream, but I didn't, I merely let Emily help me up the stairs.

_You stupid girl Bella, how could you not think this through? Yes Jake loves you, you know that but Sam loved Leah too, and Emily took him from her, that could just as easily happen to you no matter how much Jake loves you, or how unwilling he is to see anyone else, it could happen so easily, all he would have to do was see her, and he would be taken away from you forever. Stupid girl Bella, and of course there is nothing you can do about it now, you would crush him, and yourself in the process. Idiot Bella. _

I shook my head subtly trying to banish my thoughts and focus on the task at hand. Showering, was a knew kind of embarrassing especially considering I couldn't undo or do up my own bra, I was entirely thankful for Emily as it was by no means a job Jacob could or would be allowed to handle, I was also incredibly thankful for Emily not sharing all her thoughts with a pack of teenage wolves.

"BELLA!" Jake called just as Emily was helping me pull on a pair of black tights, my heart started racing at the sound of his voice and I hadn't completely realised that I had been missing him in the brief hour we were apart for.

"JACOB BLACK YOU STAY OUTSIDE THAT DOOR" Emily yelled and I smiled at the motherly tone lacing her voice, I however was very appreciative as her instructions as my dark blue bra and black panty hose were a little on the revealing side.

"Thank-you Emily, I'm sorry." I whispered as she fastened the zipper on the one dress I owned, thankful for the first time it was black.

"Please, Bella I would hope that you would do the same for me, so don't mention it." Emily smiled and I saw the sadness and guilt of her fall-our with Leah etched in her eyes.

"Of course Emily, although I would hope I would be helping you under better circumstances." My voice was still very small, and she gave me a slight smile and careful hug before heading for the door.

"I'll say goodbye now, Jake may keep you occupied for a little while." She added with a knowing smile.

"I suppose I will see you both later." She added opening the door; I was surprised to see that Jake was not there, so I followed Emily down the stairs, as I got to the landing a small smile spread across my face.

Sitting at my kitchen table was Jacob, he wore dark jeans and a white shirt, his tie was very loose around his neck and his top buttons undone, a black jacket was slung over the back of his chair, his beautiful smooth face was clean, the idea of loosing him to some other girl made me feel physically ill. I stepped out of the shadowy landing, and blushed as Jacobs jaw dropped a little, I walked over to the kitchen table stretching out my hand and running it through his still damp, inky black mess of hair, I wanted time to stop, to hide him away from so we could stay together, no imprint threats.

"Hi." I said softly, my hand slipping from his hair to his check, he kissed the inside of my palm.

"Hi." He smiled, but the slightly sad look never left his eyes, I hazard a guess that it was present in my own irises as well, and that time would be its only antidote.

"You look beautiful Bells." Jake whispered pulling me gently down onto his knee, his eyes appraising the subtle strip of lace running across the neck of my dress, which was overly simple and black, it tightened subtly just above my waist and fanned out finishing just above my knee, the dress was sleeveless but I knew forks weather to well and I had a cardigan in my bag along with a pair of dark sunglasses Emily had leant me to hide my black eye.

"I look clean, and a little less bruised." I countered which earned a slightly frustrated bemused smile.

Jake brushed his lips over my bruised eye feather light, his warm breath washed over me, Emily had been able to tone down some of the apparently substantial bruising along my hair line with make up, but my eye was badly bruised and my cast difficult to hide, I would undoubtedly need an alibi.

"What do I tell Charlie?" I asked my voice barely audible.

"I don't know." Jake answered honestly, helping me to my feet as he pulled me towards the living room, were the new window now stood, it was after 2:30 and I was expecting Charlie at any moment.

"Car crash." Jake said suddenly.

I looked up at him surprised at first and then recognition set in. I shook my head.

"No Jake." I whispered.

"Bells." Jake groaned.

"I remember Jake, I remember wearing another black dress and holding your hand 7 years ago. No Jake I can't do that, not to you." I persisted, I wasn't sure why it was important, a car crash would have been a good alibi.

"Bells it's not true, you didn't actually have a car crash." I knew it wasn't a suggestion he liked it was to close to his own reality.

"Charlie will never let me drive again," I countered; I knew this would win him over.

"And if I can't drive, then I have no way of getting to you, whenever I want." I let my voice drop to a whisper again and the look in Jake's eye told me I had won.

"Fine, What happened to you then, because Charlie is about to pull up out front." Jake whispered his lips close to my ear. Whirled in his arms panic clear in my eyes.

"Breath Bells, its just Charlie." Jake chuckled as he took my hand in his.

"I'm not so much worried for me." I smiled, however when I heard Charlie's car doors slam my grip on Jakes hand tightened. We stayed on the couch; my hand firmly entwined in Jakes my head resting lightly against his chest.

When Charlie came in I barely recognized him, his normally alert brown eyes were dull and glazed with unshed tears, his footsteps were heavy and he looked much older than when I had seen him the previous morning. For a brief moment no one moved, Charlie stood in the doorway watching us with his sad eyes, and Jake and I sat hands entwined slightly shocked at the man we both loved. I stood quickly as did Jake and he dropped my hand I meet his eyes for a quick moment before rushing towards Charlie.

"I'm so sorry Dad." I whispered my words catching in my throat; he barely noticed my cast as he pulled me into his arms. I had never known Charlie to be an emotional man, but that day in my living room with Jake and I, he was more vulnerable than I had ever seen him before.

Jake. 

"Bell's would you mind getting some stuff together for me, while I take a shower, if your ok here I am going to stay at Sue's again tonight, she's not doing well, and Seth and Leah, well there both still so young." Charlies voice was a darker tone than I had heard in seven years .

Charlie had become a second farther to me over the years. When my Mom died and Billy was first in the chair things had been rough, I remember the countless nights Charlie had stayed on the couch, he and my dad had talked and cried until 4 am, and I knew now that Charlie would be there for Sue as much as he had been for Me and My Dad. I was filled with a new kind of respect for the man before me.

"Sure dad." Bella said softly, squeezing his hand. "I can wrap up the Lasagne I made yesterday for Sue if you like." Bella suggested, I knew she would do anything she could to help the Clearwater's, even if she didn't know Sue that well anymore, she knew Seth and Leah.

"Thank-you Bells" Charlie smiled at his daughters kindness, so did I.

Bella disappeared and upstairs, I could heard her sorting through things upstairs, Charlie turned to look at me.

"You know I am proud of you Jack." Charlie said quietly, I looked at my shoes my hands in my pockets somehow despite my obvious height advantage I felt very small.

"I mean it Jacob, I have watched you grow up a lot these past years and taking care of your dad the way you have, and all the care you have given Bella these past months, that says something about a mans character. I guess what I am trying to say is if there was anyone out there who I would want for my Bella, it would be you son." He stopped talking and I looked up into the older version of Bella's chocolate eyes, a smile hinting across Charlie's sad features.

"But Jake, if you ever hurt her I swear t-." Charlie started but I cut him of.

"Charlie, Bella means more to me than anything in the world, I would never dream of hurting her." I said my tone filled with promise that Charlie despite not knowing the various truths would understand.

"I know Jake, I'm happy for you, I have been waiting for Bells to realises her true feelings for a while now." Charlie said with a twinkle in his chocolate eyes.

"W-what?" I gasped.

"Yes Jake, I may not be the most filled in father on the planet but there are some things I do know that even Bella doesn't." he chuckled a little as he turned for the stairs.

"Oh Jake," he said remembering something.

" If that Cullen ever comes back." Charlies voice trailed of.

"Oh I will Charlie." I replied solemnly, to his unspoken request.

"I'm glad she picked you Kid, the two of you deserve to be happy."

"Thank Charlie, and I'm glad she picked me too, real glad."

"I'll see you both down in La Push I guess." Charlie said sadly as he climbed the stairs slowly.

"Dad." I called as I ducked under the doorway into my house, Bella close behind me her hand firmly clasped in mine.

"Jake." Came my fathers reply as he wheeled himself into the lounge room, there were thick purple bags beneath his bloodshot eyes, and he was struggling with his black tie, he took in Bella and my entwined hands and I saw the ghost of a smile light his face.

"Billy." Bella whispered stepping forward to help him with his tie, much like it had with Charlie her caring presence seemed to soothe my father and I couldn't help but smile at her once more.

"Thank you Bella." Billy said softly and Bella kissed his check before her hand slipped back into mine. I knelt next to my fathers' chair and he placed his hand on my shoulder, he nodded, his unspoken words were more powerful than anything either of us could have spoken, there was Greif, happiness, love, respect and pride in his eyes.

"Its time to go, Dad." I said breaking the silence that had befallen the small room. Bella took my hand and Charlie merely nodded.

Harry had two funerals, we lay him to rest at the La Push cemetery on a hilltop over looking the dark ocean, and Sue cried on Charlies shoulder her hand on my dads shoulder. I stood next to Seth, I could tell he was trying to be strong for his Mom; it was a feeling I remembered all too well.

When the service began I felt my brothers close in around Seth, I placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder he would not have to go through this alone we where all there for him Paul, (who had recently come back from following a leech trail up to the Alaskan border) Jared, Quill, Sam, Embry and I would have his back. I felt a pang of guilt as I sore Leah standing alone between her Mother and Brother technically she was one of us now to, but that was not something any of us were able to comprehend just yet.

After a moment Bella raised my hand to her lips, before her fingers slipped form mind, I watched her as she stepped lightly around me she ruffled Seth's dark hair and he smiled sadly at her, she came to a halt next to Leah I felt my jaw drop as Leah's stern mask fell away, revealing the girl we had all known _before_. Bella placed her hand on the slightly older girls shoulder.

As kids we had all played together, Me, Rebecca, Rachel, Leah, Seth (who was always a little to young) and Bella. Bella unlike my sisters and Leah had never been a particularly big Barbie girl and being two years younger than the other girls had always gravitated towards me and occasionally Seth. She had never been a part of the 'Lee Lee, Rach and Becca club' (who had giggled and laughed for hours on end about boys and who they one the Rez' they would one day marry) but they had always been friendly, until of course Bella's visits had stopped the summer she turned 12, two summers after my Mom had died. I hadn't realised the two girls had spoken much since Bella's return, but of course the recent months of my life had been fairly dominated by trying to stop the constant threat to the girl I loves life.

Bella wrapped her broken arm around Leah shoulder and tears cascaded down both girls checks, I saw a sad look cross over both Sam and Emily's faces as they realized there was nothing they could do to help the 19 year old girl they had both loved fiercely.

As Harry's coffin was lowered to the ground I felt Seth shudder beneath my hand.

"Hang in there Seth it will all be over soon." I murmured knowing Sam would hear me and understand. As I ran from Bella's house early that morning Sam, had been phased in alone, we had decided that when, or if Seth needed us Embry and I would run him into the woods and Phase with him. Embry was chosen as he had never known his father and knew how to live with it, and Me because I was the only wolf who had new what it was like to loose a parent and had the best chance of reaching him.

Seth stepped forward his fist releasing a shower of dirt across his father's coffin I watched him suck in a shaky breath, the subtle shakes rolling down his shoulders, he was over whelmed by grief and as he walked back towards me I heard his whispered plea.

"Get me out of here Jake. Please." The 15-year-old kid begged and with a fleeting look at Bella, who was soothing a silently distraught Leah, Embry and I ran Seth towards the woods. Seth was stripping form his suit as soon as he hit the edge of the trees Embry picked up both our clothes as we ran deeper into the woods. Seth stopped running when we hit a clearing in the woods, we were close to the beach were the Bon fire place and Harry's wake/tribal funeral was to be held, but also far enough away that no danger would come to anyone. Seth closed his eyes and almost immediately a tall and slightly gangly looking sandy wolf, stood before me. I squeezed my eyes closed and relaxed my muscles. Within a second Seth's thoughts and pain were echoing around through my head.

_Seth, just breathe, breath Seth. _I murmured mentally as I felt Seth's grief taking hold of him, I was glad I was able to help him his grief wasn't effect me in the ways it normally would and I was fairly certain I knew why, in recent days I had felt the true unnatural maddening pain that wasn't supposed to ever occur.

_You will get through this Seth, and you will never have to do it alone. _I repeated my thoughts over and over again, reminding him that harry had loved him with all his heart, and that he would always be watching over him. As I tried to soothe Seth, I realized that I was almost repeating the words Charlie, Billy and Harry had constantly feed to me in the days following my Moms funeral, I felt proud to be able to repay Harry now. Seth was calming down and he had scene my memory and the feeling of pride at being able to help Harry Clearwater's son.

_Thank you Jake. _Seth's voice was nothing more than a whisper from the slowly lifting grief, but I knew how strong he was and new that he would eventually be ok again.

We stayed in the clearing along time; Seth lay on the ground his head on his paws his thoughts were memories of his time with Harry, Embry and I helped him out as much as we could, thinking of our own memories of Harry and Seth.

_What about Leah. _Seth thought suddenly.

_Its ok Seth, she's with Bella. _Embry thought soothingly.

_BELLA!_ my thoughts roared and I was running.

_Jake, wait slow down_. Embry and Seth thought at once I could hear them behind me.

_I cant, I. I left Bella with Leah, she's new, she's only phased once, and she could hurt Bella. _

_Shit! _Both wolves thought picking up their pace. I phased on the edge of the trees, and Embry quickly threw me my clothes. It was getting darker I knew they would light the fire soon, but I had to find Bella and Leah.

"Charlie!" I cried as I spotter him and Billy beers in hand.

"Jacob." Charlie replied slightly confused at the anxiety riddling my voice.

"Where's Bella?" I asked quickly.

"She's with Leah, son." Charlie said as Embry and Seth came up behind me.

"Seth." Billy called, Embry nodded at him and Seth went to talk to my dad and Old Quill. Charlie pointed to the direction Bella and Leah had gone in and I ran of Embry close behind me. They were sitting on the rocks, near the waters edge, not to far from the bon fire; I felt the air rush from my lungs as I heard both girls talking quietly, calmly. Leah was stronger than I had given her credit for.

"Dude your such a mess." Embry chuckled as he caught up with me, clapping me on the back.

"Shut up." I laughed grabbing him in a headlock.

A low howl ripped through the night and, Embry and I released each other, he nodded turning back to the bon fire, while I continued my way across the sand to the girls sitting on the rocks.

"Bells, Leah!" I called their silhouettes turned towards me.

"The fires starting." I called awkwardly not really sure what to say.

"Were on out way Jake." Leah called back to me.

Something hit my ears wrong, and I couldn't place it, Leah's breathing was even, it was Bella's that wasn't, I could hear her tiny sobs, as she tried to calm her breathing.

"Bella?" I said quietly, stepping quickly towards the rocks. "Bell's baby, what's wrong?" My voice was lost a little in the wind and the waves but I knew at least Leah had heard me.

"What. Nothing I'm fine." Bella said quickly, getting up of the rock and pushing past me, Leah followed her I tried to catch her eye but her bloodshot blue irises were steadily watching the crashing waves as she and Bella hurried up the beach.

I stood stupidly still for a moment longer, before realising where I was and hurrying up the beach. Bella stood with Leah, on the opposite side of the fire, the flame making her chocolate eyes gleam, and the soft tears that rolled down her checks glinted in the light. Dad, Sam and Old Quill delivered the traditional speeches, but I barely heard them, I watched Bella intently but her beautiful brown eyes refused to meet mine.

Bella.

The fire flickered in front of me the orange flames licked at the night sky, I could feel the tears rolling down my checks, I didn't bother to wipe them away I knew most people would cry as Billy, Sam and Quill's great-grandfather delivered the tribes final goodbyes in Quileute.

_Your being stupid Bella_ a small voice inside my head screamed at me. _Jake loves you, you idiot. _

I looked up across the flames, his face was shadowy, the second I averted my gaze from the flickering blaze of orange, his eyes claimed mine and I was powerless to look away.

_Just talk to him, you idiot, what's the worst thing that could happen _

But that was my problem I knew what the worst-case scenario was, it was me alone again and Jake completely in love with some other girl. I hated myself for denying my feelings for so long, and now right when I had admitted to Jake and myself that I loved him back it was all going to be taken away, because his love for me, no matter how honest and true it may be, wasn't going to be enough. Not when he saw _her_, whoever she was too be.

Billy, Old-Quill and Sam fell silent, and I closed my eyes against the vast darkness of Jacobs's beautiful eyes.

"Bella." Leah whispered, I opened my eyes to see her standing before me.

"Lets get some food ok." She said softly her voice nothing more than a whisper her blue eyes bloodshot.

"I'm fine Leah, you should get some food, spend sometime with your mom, I'm really not hungry."

"Ok." Leah nodded. "Hey Bella," she called as I began to walk away.

"Thankyou." She said quietly.

"Anytime." I returned her small smile.

I slipped through the hordes of people I was headed for our tree the white washed drift wood tree were so many months ago Jake had first told me about the cold ones.

It didn't take him very long to find me, I think a part of me took me to that tree because I _knew_ he would find me there.

"Hey." He said softly sitting down beside me, I could feel the warmth radiating from his body, and I wanted nothing more than to snuggle against his chest and cry, but I couldn't do that to myself, not again, not knowing it would be so much worse than before.

When Edward left, I had, had Jake, he was there to hold onto me, to put me backtogether again, to love me. If I lost him too then I would have no one to pull me back from the darkness, there would be no one to save me.

"Hi." I whispered my voice capable of nothing more.

"Bells..." Jake whispered his left hand tucked a strand of hair back behind my ear, I shivered at his touch.

I leapt up from the tree. "I-I cant do this right now Jake." My blood boiled beneath me skin and I moved away from him.

"Do what?" he asked incredulous

"Loose myself again, I can't repeat it, I cant do it again, it will hurt to much. I wont be able to come back.." I realised I was yelling and dropped my voice a little, turning on my heel and running up the beach.

"Bella, BELLS WAIT." He called after me, I knew he could have caught me in a heartbeat but, he was playing human for me, and deep down I was grateful for it.

NO, I know you don't want to Jake, but you wont have a choice will you. It will be just like Leah and Sam, your feelings for me they wont matter anymore because you'll have _her." _Pure hatred laced through my voice, aimed at the faceless girl who would take him away from me.

Jake

NO, I know you don't want to Jake, but you wont have a choice will you, it will be just like Leah and Sam, your feelings for me wont matter anymore because you'll have _her_." she screamed still facing away from me Hatred that punctuated her words,digging into me like nails.

NO YOU WON'T." I shouted. _Idiot Jacob, you should have told her sooner, how could you do this to her, all because you were to chicken to hear her reaction, good one Jakey boy now look where you've landed yourself. _

"You will never end up like Leah, Bells," I heard her breathing change for a moment, she was holding her breath.

"Yes I will." She whispered trusting that I would be able to hear her.

"When you meet the girl your _supposed_ to be with, you wont have a choice, Jake please don't do this to me." she begged her voice climbing in volume, I wanted to burst through the invisible barrier between us and hold her in my arms, I sucked in a breath and let all my secrets come out.

"No you wont bells, because I never will, there is no other girl out there. Your it for me Bella, I will never see anyone else. I love you Isabella Swan, I always have and I always will. You're my imprint, and if you'll have me then you, will be making me the happi…" I was cut of by a blur of dark wavy hair, she through herself into my arms, and I held her tightly against my chest, I could feel her tears soak through my shirt.

"Me?" she whispered pulling back to look at my face, the look of surprise and elation that crossed her face caused a huge smile to spread across my face. I nodded her eyes grew wide and a small smile crept across her lips.

I took a deep breath and looked up into Bella's eyes, "but baby there are something's I need to explain."

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_REVIEW AWAY!_


	12. Surrender

Ok, so i havent updated in a while, sorry about that, but here it is 4,040 words multiple perspectives, 'Surrender'.

hope you enjoy PLEASE review, it inspires me to write more/faster also i love to hear your ideas as to what should happen next.

xx Lila

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or any of its characters (thank god)

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"_Jake wait up." She screamed, looking up at the boy waiting idly at the end of the lane, she jumped up slamming her foot down trying to kick-start her bike, but nothing happened. He grinned at her with Laughing eyes spinning his bike around and speeding back towards her. _

"_You loose two years for not be strong enough to kick-start, your own bike." The boy chuckled his inky black hair tucked behind his ear catching slightly in the wind. _

"_You know we cant all, be freakishly strong like you." Jake she cried over the roar of the red bikes engine. _

_He scanned her face with laughing eyes a smile creeping across his lips, she grinned back at him before, pulling her bike into gear, speeding down the road leaving him a slight cloud of dust a deep look of joy sparkling across his near black eyes. _

**Bella.**

My thoughts were reeling incoherently, and in my ears the same words repeated over and over again.

_You're it for me Bella, You're my imprint._

"Explain?" I asked my voice catching in my throat.

"Explain what Jake." I whispered my forehead leaning against Jakes head his arms wrapped around my shoulders.

"There are things we didn't know before, things the elders didn't understand."

"What is it Jake?" I asked pulling his face down so I could see his eyes.

"Talk to me please, you can trust me." I whispered.

"Of course I can, baby I trust you more than anyone in the world, but this, this is hard for me to explain." He whispered pressing his forehead against mine, I shivered involuntarily, before I could stop him he had unbuttoned his white shirt and was slipping it from his shoulders, I raised my hand in protest. He smiled and cocked one eyebrow.

"Do I ever get cold Bells." He grinned pulling the shirt over my shoulders, it was warm from his skin, and I felt a content smile cross my lips.

"We should get you home though." Jake said his eyes darting back towards the bon fire.

**Jacob.**

"I don't want you to leave." She said softly, her arm around my waist, mine around her shoulders hugging her to my side.

"Who said I was going anywhere Bells?" I grinned at her and she kissed my the hand that was resting on her shoulder.

We walked back towards the bonfire, which was still in full swing. I caught Leah's teary blue eyes and she nodded at me a small smile playing across her lips it didn't however reach her sad eyes. I understood her unspoken appraisal, she understood everything now. She understood my pain over not having Bella and she understood Sam's pain at having to loose her to Emily. Leah hated the imprinting, of that much I was certain, but I knew she wanted Bella to be happy, she also knew I was mad about Bell's long before the werewolf gene kicked in.

Bella spotted Charlie first and I lead her towards the small group, through the darkness and flickering lights I could see Charlie, Sue, my Dad and a few other members of the council all holding beers in hand.

Charlie stood up from his seat when we approached him, his eyes centred in on Bella's broken arm a look of shock crossed his face, followed immediately by a face of shame for not registering his daughters injury sooner.

"Dad, Jakes gonna drive me home." Bella said watching her father her eyes full of concern.

"Sure thing Bells" Charlie replied with a small smile. "You get some sleep okay honey." Charlie added as he pulled Bella into his arms.

"I love you kid." He said in a whisper meant for Bella's ears alone, Charlie was not an outwardly emotional man.

"I love you too Dad so much." Her voice was soft and a little teary. He let her go and she quickly whipped her wet eyes.

"Bella." Sue called from the other side of the cluster; Bells squeezed my hand before walking quickly over to Sue.

Charlie clapped me on the shoulder looking at me directly in the eye.

"Jake, I want you to stay with Bells tonight." His eyes shone with Greif for his friend and desperation to keep his only child safe.

I nodded.

"I trust you like family Jacob, but if you try anything on Bella, I could very easily forget my feelings towards you." I could see it in his eyes that his threat was legitimate, there was however a smile pulling at the corner of his mouth.

I looked him dead in the eye. "Of course Chief Swan." I tried hard not to smile; it had been along time since I had spoken to Charlie so formerly.

"Thank-you Son, you have no idea the peace of mind it brings me to have you in her life." Charlie spoke quietly, and I saw the pride in my dad's eyes as Charlie spoke.

Bella stepped lightly back to my side, my hand instinctually wrapped around hers.

"You take care of this one ok Bells." Charlie chuckled.

Bells looked up at me for a moment before turning her attention back to Charlie.

"Ill take good care of him Chief." Bella replied keeping her face serious, save for her eyes, which sparkled mischievously.

Charlie laughed and Sue stood to hug me.

"Thank-you for Seth Jacob, he is lucky to have you." Sue whispered quickly I could hear the tears threatening to break through her voice.

"No Sue, were lucky to have him." I murmured quickly before Sue reclaimed her seat, my dad meet my eyes and nodded slightly before winking at me, yet another unspoken conversation passing between us.

"Come on." I murmured to Bells, guiding her through across the moonlit path, back to were I had left the Rabbit.

Bella kept an iron grip on my hand, as we hurried through the dark. The drive back to Forks passed quickly. Of course she hadn't let on but Bella was freezing, she sat as close to me, as the car would allow my free arm wrapped around her shoulders as we speed back to Charlie's house.

"So what did you and Charlie talk about." Bella asked curiosity getting the better of her, as we passed the treaty line, entering Forks.

"He asked me to stay with you tonight, before subtly reminding me of the gun he keeps in his room." I laughed a little as I recounted Charlie and my conversation. I could feel the blood rising to Bella's checks as she blushed.

We pulled up out front and I helped Bella out of the car and up to her room. Colour filled her face once more as she tried and failed to pull the black tights she wore free from her legs.

"Here baby." I said softly, carefully freeing her feet and lower legs from the stretchy black material.

"This is so embarrassing." She grimaced as she pulled a pair of sweats on underneath her black dress.

"I can't even dress myself properly." She grumbled sitting down on her bed, a tank top in her hands.

"Come here." I said softly. With a begrudging smile she stood up and I unzipped her dress, she slid it down her arms, so that her chest was still covered as I guided her broken arm into the sleeve of her shirt. She let the dress drop to the ground pulling the tank top down quickly to cover her exposed midriff.

"Thank you." She whispered, like the night before not meeting my eyes.

"Before I explain, I need you to know Bell's that I hate myself for imprinting on you." I blurted out quickly, her face dropped immediately tears springing to her eyes, she sucked in a deep breath and I saw her concentrate hard on holding her tears at bay.

_Shit, that really didn't come out right. Idiot Jake. _

"No, no, no Bells wait, that didn't come out right, I just mean that I loved you so much before the imprint, I-I didn't want the compulsion of it all, I wanted you to be with me for _me_, not some stupid wolfish thing." I said softly avoiding her deep chocolate gaze.

"Jacob Ephraim Black, you have been my best friend since I was 5 years old, when I came back, it was as if nothing had changed, yet at the same time everything had. We were always meant to be together Jake. All this mythical stuff just got in the way for a little while, but now, its you and me Jake, like its supposed to be." She crawled closer to me, her soft lips pressed against mine.

"I love you so much, Bells." I whispered into her hair as I crushed her against my chest, I pulled back a little so I could see her face.

"Bells." I began hesitantly.

"I know, know _things_ to explain." She said with a smile, it didn't reach the worry in her eyes though. She wrapped the blankets tightly around her shoulders and looked up at me expectantly.

"I don't, I don't know how or were to start." I admitted jumping up from her bed and pacing the room.

"You said something before, about something that the elders didn't understand." She said softly, remembering of what I had said earlier.

"Right, well none of the elders remember much from the last 'time'. None of them were, none of them were like _us_ but most of their dads were." I began, struggling to find the correct words.

"Which means that what we know now is all based off of old story's and legends. This time however there are things that either didn't happen last time, or weren't recorded. We know, or are learning at least, a lot more, about, about imprints." The words tumbled from my mouth and I looked up at Bella to make sure she was following me. She gave me a small smile nodding to demonstrate that she understood, however I couldn't look away from her sad concerned eyes.

"So before we didn't no much about the whole thing, I mean we had all heard of the love at first sight, soul connecting stuff but we didn't know any of the logistics, the old legends also spoke of it being incredibly rare. Know however we aren't so sure. So with three of the six, well now 8 I guess, wolves having found there imprints the council decided that they needed to do a lot more research." I looked up at Bella's beautiful chocolate eyes and was met with a lock of confusion.

"How long?" she asked plainly, I knew what she alluding to, I panicked and decided that I would play dumb.

"How long what?" I replied feigning ignorance.

"How long ago did it happen, the imprint I mean?" she asked her voice was still soft but I could see anger beginning to cloud her eyes.

I sighed and dropped my gaze. "It happened that day you came down to La Push, in the rain. The day you found out about…" I pulled up short; she knew what day I was referring to.

"TWO MONTHS!" she cried her face darkening.

"For two months, you have been in complete and total agony, over me and you didn't think to tell Me." she screamed hitting me with a pillow.

'_Complete and total agony' How did she know that? _I thought as I ducked another flying pillow, then the memory hit.

"_So what if she doesn't want to be with him, suppose she's already in love with someone else. Does the imprint just takes that away?" Bella asked, a slightly horrified tone laced her voice._

"_No, no she will always get a choice. Remember he will be whatever she needs him to be, a best friend, a shoulder to cry, a brother, boyfriend, lover whatever she needs he will be that for her. But knowing that she is in love with someone else, or knowing that she doesn't love him the same way. For him, that is total agony, he lives in torture knowing that she doesn't want him." I refused to meet Bella's gaze as I recounted the pain and suffering I was all too familiar with, to her. _

The memory faded from my mind and I looked up at Bella, angry tears were pooling in her eyes.

"Bells.." I started but she cut me off.

"How could you be so stupid, huh Jake, why wouldn't you tell me, you spent 2 months living in torture because you thought that I wouldn't love you?" her anger faltered a little and I caught a glimpse of the hurt she was trying to keep from her eyes.

"I'm so sorry baby, but you were still, you still. I was scared Bella." I admitted looking up at her.

**Bella:**

"I'm so sorry baby, but you were still, you still. I was scared Bella." Jakes voice was low, as he raised his face to meet my eyes the anger and hurt that had boiled under my skin disappeared as he looked at me with sad scared eyes. He looked so young and vulnerable, his eyes bore into me and I felt my face soften. A tear slipped from my eye, I made to brush it away hastily, but he was faster trapping the tear beneath his thumb watching me carefully.

"Scared of what Jake?" I asked trying to keep my voice even.

"I was so scared of loosing you bells." He whispered, he tried to shift his gaze but I lay my hand against his check dragging his eyes back to meet mine.

"How Jake? How could you possibly loose me." I asked but slowly realization was setting in.

"Edward." I breathed Jake flinched noticeably, before bowing his head slightly, a nod.

"Oh Jake." I whispered tears welling in my eyes and I fought hard to keep them at bay. Until of course Jakes soul searching dark eyes found mine and I sore that his beautiful brown orbs glinted with unshed tears, at that moment I felt my heart break and my tears spilled from my eyes cascaded down my checks, blinding me for a moment, I felt jakes warm hands grip my shoulders pulling me towards him, I ignored the shooting pain in my arm as I hugged myself to him, my tears staining his shirt.

"Jake." I half blubbered; at the sound of my teary voice he tightened his arms around me.

"Jake." I said again this time my voice a little more composed.

"I'm, I'm so sorry, I put you through so much pain, I hurt you so much and I, I made you go through so much pain, that you so wholly don't deserve. When Edward left, he was the only thing my heart had ever known, he broke my heart. But then you came back into my life again Jake and you started putting the pieces back together, you put my heart back together Jake, but its not mine even mine to keep anymore. What I have with you it, its so different it's so good and warm. I fell at home when I am with you Jacob. You are my home Jake." The last words were a whisper, Jake was silent and I dropped my eyes. Jacob cupped my chin raising my eyes to meet his, I let the last guards I had protecting me fall away. As he looked at me, I surrendered my heart.

**Jacob:**

…."I feel at home when I am with you Jacob, you're my home Jake." Her words hit me like a tonne of bricks, I wanted to pinch myself to wake up from this sick dream that would undoubtedly cause me so much pain in the morning, yet I couldn't tare myself way from her glistening brown eyes. I blinked unwillingly and suddenly her chocolate irises were gone hidden beneath a veil of mahogany hair. Tentatively I brushed back her hair cupping her chin in my hand as I pulled her eyes back to meet mine.

_Kiss her! KISS HER NOW YOU MORON! _

As her dark eyes locked onto mine, for a brief moment I sore an emotion that I knew so well, but could not place, flash across her chocolate irises. She watched me hesitantly before closing the distance between, her lips awakened my own, as she traced my bottom lip with the tip of her tongue, and I felt my shoulders tremble slightly.

She took hold of the collar of my open shirt, pulling me towards her whilst she leaned back against the pillows adorning her bed.

I could feel her pulse quickening and her breathing becoming shallow, I broke my lips from hers trailing down my lips down her neck.

"I love you Bells" I whispered my lips beneath my ear.

"Jake." She half sighed half squeaked, my lips nibbling against her ear.

_Jake stop! You have to tell her right now. _

My thoughts echoed through my head, and I knew that what Sam had told me was true, Bella deserved better than the secrets I was keeping from her.

"Bells, Bells Baby I still have to explain." I murmured returning my lips to hers quickly, her soft lips when unresponsive, and sore the trepidation flood her eyes.

"Jake would you just tell me already, rip the bandaid already, I can take It." she promised me looking up into my eyes.

"Ok, so basically the when the werewolf gene fully kicks in we grow really fast, as you already know, its no joke Bells, when I say that I am older than you, calendar years I might be 17, but physically I am about 22 years old. The accelerated growth spurt allows us to reach full physical maturity because well, we don't age." I spoke so quickly that I wasn't completely sure that she heard me; I shifted my gaze back to her face, her eyes flashed with anger. She jumped up from her bed whirling around to face me.

"Am I the only one in this god forsaken town who is ever going to age!" she cried, and I flashed back to when I had first told Bella about phasing. When she had jumped up screaming about all the fairytales in the world being real. This time however Bella's rage was short lived and the look on her face broke my heart.

"I..you." she murmured tears spilling over her eyes, as she raced for her bed room door.

I heard her light footsteps descend the stairs quickly, her breathing uneven her heartbeat was erratic a door slammed downstairs and her breathing turned to choking sobs, in the living room.

_You my friend are an absolute idiot._ I thought to myself wrenching her door open and thundering down the stairs.

"Bells, please, Bells open the door, let me explain." I begged each small sob made my knees go week.

_If the pack could see me now _I thought pathetically, trying to door locked door handle once more. I really, really didn't want to break down Charlie's door.

"You don't have to explain Jake, I get it." Bella said through the door, I hadn't noticing her sobbing had ceased I could hear her calm breath on the other side of the door.

She opened the door holding out her hand, signalling for me to not come close to her it pained me but I held my ground, using the doorframe for support.

"I get it," she said once more her voice was eerily calm, anxiety surged through me her eyes were flat the spark igniting the deep pools of chocolate was absent from stare.

"You aren't going to age, you will stay presumably forever looking like, like that." she said from across the room motioning towards me, well more so my exposed muscular chest.

"And I, I am going to love you, and I'm going to desperately_ need_ to have you in my life, and I will end up looking like your mother and then your grandma." Her brow furrowed and she turned away from me. In that moment I realised two things; one that this wasn't the first time she had been worried about being the only one to grow old. The second was that she wanted to have me in her life. She wanted no needed a life with _me._ When she said that, well it took everything I had not to rush to her side and crush my lips against hers. Somehow though I managed to find the restraint and I stepped quickly towards the couch.

"Bella." It was both a question and a comment. Her head jerked up at her name but she refused to turn around.

I took a deep breath and continued what I had been trying to get out all night.

"Bells you were the most important thing in my life before the imprint, and now, Bells I literally couldn't live in a world without you. When Sam first imprinted on Emily, she was 18. The Elders and Sam they were all really worried because what would happen in 80 years? When Emily had moved on from this life. The Alpha would be completely destroyed, his soul taken away from him. The elders searched our records frantically there was nothing they could find however about how the wolves dealt with out living their imprints. Time went by, and Sam was the only wolf so he was hoping that he would be able to stop phasing, and grow old alongside Emily, about a year and a half ago Emily was supposed to be celebrating her 19th birthday it was the first time that she and Sam had been _together._ " I sore the blush rise along Bella's neck.

"Anyway, within a week of Em's birthday Paul and Jared started phasing, and Sam started to panic again, more wolves meant there was less chance of him being able to become de-active in his phasing. Until of course Emily came home from a week in Waterville looking _older_. It was as if she had aged three years in a week. Sam and Emily were panicked, they visited the Elders immediately, no one could explain it. It wasn't until a few months ago that they realised, Emily looks exactly the same as she did when she came home from Waterville. Then it was discovered; the wolves' girls are connected to their wolves in many ways. But when they truly accept their Wolf's love and devotion, except them as their mate, that is when the imprint is truly set in stone and has more outward physical effects. Emily 'grew' from a 19 year old to that of a 22 year old, so that she was physically only a year or two younger than her mate. After that initial growth spurt however Emily stopped aging, Just like Sam." I stopped to take a breath; Bella whirled around to face me.

Her eyes were alight with curiosity, fear, intuition and so much more that I could hardly take it all in at once.

"So…. I… you and me …when." She spluttered unable to form full sentences.

I nodded, I could see the hundreds of questions pop-corning through her mind as she tried to piece together everything I had just said.

"Bella's say something please." I begged watching her chocolate eyes.

"So when we, when you and I." she tried again still unable to fully wrap her head around her own personal involvement in the mythical world she had grown so accustomed to.

Finally, her eyes calmed down and her breathing returned to normal "I'm not going to age." she whispered sitting down next to me.

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**REVIEW! **


	13. To Infinite and Beyond

Hello all,

firstly i want to apologize for the huge and inexcusable hiatus this and my other story took i am truly truly sorry, life got hectic and i got writers block, and days weeks and months sort of just flew by. However thanks to the amazing help from Aislynnrose2010 (check out her story Leah's New Life of Hope- its awesome) I am back with a hundred and one ideas, that are eager to be written down. thank you all for sticking around to read the rest of this i promise i wont let you down. so without further ado

Enjoy.. to infinite and beyond

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**_Jake. _**

It was quiet for a long time, I watched her through my peripherals waiting for her to speak, scream, faint anything, something. She moved so fast that even my heightened senses weren't prepared. Her lips crashed into mine, I blinked stupidly.

"Kiss me." she whispered in my ear.

"Bells wait." I began barely believing I was giving up the change to kiss her.

"Don't we need to talk about this some more or something?" I asked incredulous, to the turn this conversation had taken.

She shook her head pulling back to meet my eyes. "I don't wanna talk anymore Jake, I don't wanna think about vampires and werewolves, imprints and anti-ageing. For right now I want to just be Bella and Jake all the rest of it can wait. Just be my 17 year old boyfriend and kiss me god-damn-it."

She had barely got the words out before my lips attacked hers, she was half lying, half leaning on the couch and as I deepened the kiss she grabbed the collar of my white shirt pulling me down with her. With her arms wrapped around my neck and her lips against mine everything was her, nothing else existed nothing else mattered.

_Bella_

He broke the kiss first, my head was spinning from lack of oxygen. Jake rested his forehead against mine, noses nearly touching I could feel his breath wash over my face.

"I love you Bell." He whispered

"Always I whispered keeping my eyes closed, to afraid to fall deeper into the abyss of warmth that was his dark brown eyes.

He snickered slightly, "Always Bells, to infinite and back ."

"You mean beyond." I whispered my eyelids snapping open, to meet his laughing eyes.

"Yes Bell, I love you to Infinite and beyond, always have always will"

"Good, 'cause your not to bad yourself" I whispered pressing my lips lightly against his once more.

I closed my eyes to the sound of Jakes laugh I kept my eyes closed letting the sleep I was fighting drag me under. I felt Jake shifting on the couch but couldn't bring up the strength to open my eyes. I felt my head rest on his chest , my ear pressed against his temperate skin, and his lips on my hair as calm thoughts and sweet dreams began to overcome me.

The morning light crept through my open window, my gossamer drapes waved gently in the morning breezed. I opened my eyes slowly, attempting to adjust to my surroundings, I was near 100 percent sure I had not fallen asleep in my room last night. Stretching out my stiff arms my hands curled around a piece of paper, it crinkled loudly in my hand as I wiped the sleep from my eyes.

Morning pretty girl,

I had to go back to the Rez, Sam's doing…

Come down, or call me when you wake up.

Love J

I closed my eyes once more I could feel the smile pulling at my lips; I scrambled out of bed, being careful to not jostle my arm too much. For the first time in months and months I felt truly alive. I near skipped to the bathroom and quickly shampooed my hair. As I made my way out of my room, the to-white pages of my calendar caught my eye. I blanched at the boldly written lettering of APRIL.

In my self imposed walking coma, I had not realised the months of my life that had thrown by, the hypnotic effects the Cullen's had, had on me had truly taken over every aspect of my life. I fingered the calendar gingerly, not sure if I wanted to feel the humiliation of knowing how much time I had wasted away. Finally I flicked it of the hook and sat down on my bed. The months in which I had been, pinning for Edward were unsurprisingly empty, the pages still crisp and new there wasn't even an etching from previous months. I continued to turn back over the time I had missed, I reached September and felt my blood run cold, I heard the soft thud of vellum being dropped. My breath came in shaky gasps looking down I sore the date that had bought back a flood of painful and joyous memories. The red ink was a little faded the date was the first that I had inscribed to the fresh white pages over two years ago but still it stood boldly exploding out of its white box reading_  
18 today= Connor. _

As the 13 simple letters washed over me again and again, I felt hot tears sting my eyes.

"He promised he'd find me, he promised." I leapt up off my bed tears streaming down my face, I couldn't stay in the house any longer I ran out the door grabbing my keys of the table, the sun has disappeared and grey clouds were beginning to flood the sky.

"Come on" I muttered to the truck trying to choke back tears as I throttled the engine, until it roared to life. I barrelled recklessly towards La Push. I needed Jake to hold me, to promise that unlike everyone else in my life he would never go away, to tell me everything would be all right again. As I speed shakily down the empty roads towards La Push images flashed through my mind like wild fire.

**Flashback -** **1995**

I was 5 years old, my very first day of school and unlike all the other parents who bought their kids into class Renée dropped me of the front Gate, I crept towards the front entrance terrified and all alone.

"BELLS" a boys voice called out from behind me.

"Connor" I screamed running clumsily towards him, tripping up just before I reached him. Tears welled in my big brown eyes, and I looked up to see Connor O'Roark my 9 year old cousin standing before me, his hand outstretched and a big smile on his face.

"Let me see it Bells." His voice bore no trace of mocking or resentment as he helped me up from the ground examining the shallow scratch on my elbow. He put a bandaid on it and grinned a semi toothless grin at me, which had me giggling as he took my hand and showed me to the 1st grade classroom.

"Ill see you after school ok Bell?" He asked with a smile reaching his pretty blue eyes.

I nodded gazing around the brightly lit classroom with bright eyes.

**Flashback 1999 **

"My Moms been waiting weeks for this, She's taking me out for Ice cream afterward " Cynthia Tweed boasted her hands on her 10 year old tutu clad hips.

"Where's your Mom Bella." Maria Dove asked quietly.

"Bella's Mommy's not coming, Bella's not good enough to have anyone watch her." Cynthia interrupted anger flashing in her eyes.

"That's not true." I cried tears welling in my 9 year old eyes. "My Cousin Connor is here." I added proudly.

"Who cares about your stupid cousin, its not like he can take you out for ice cream, or wants to see your stinky dance." Cynthia added and many of the other girls laughed.

"Don't listen to her Bella" Maria said quietly just before Ms Summer's 4th grade Ballet class took to the stage.

After the final curtain call for Ms Summer and Ms Curvets Ballet recital, the parents and grandparents of the dancers came backstage to collect their children. I stood quietly, in the corner; wishing and waiting. Cynthia Tweed stuck her tongue out at me as she left with her mother. Tears welled in my eyes once more until I heard my name being called.

"Bells!" Connor cried as he ran into the room.

I grinned as he picked me up in a bear hurt twirling me around.

"Bells you were so good, I am so proud of you Bell-Bell." Connor grinned putting me back on the ground.

I giggled in response throwing my arms around his waist.

"Come on Bells, let's go get an ice cream cone." Connor suggested and I nodded eagerly, to happy to speak knowing that someone did care enough to see my 'stinky' dance.

**Flashback 2003**

"Connor" I whispered into the receiver.

"Bells, Bells what is it." his voice was panic stricken.

"Connor I'm scared there's no power, and I think I hear one of _them_ outside."

"What! Bells where's your Mom?" Connor asked hurriedly, I could hear the sound of his cars engine roaring to life,

"She's not hear, I whispered clutching the receiver tighter, "She's out with Johnny or someone."

"Typical Renée" Connor muttered savagely. "She finally thinks she's found a good guy but forgets to take out the trash of the last hopeful. I'm on my way baby-girl I'll be there soon just keep talking on the phone ok." Connor's voice was smooth and soothing as I closed my eyes holding onto the phone like a life raft.

"So how was your day?" he asked quietly...

**Flashback** **2004**

"What NO, why?" I screamed jumping up from the floor.

"Its not my choice Bells, I have to go my Mom she kicked me out." He replied not meeting my eyes.

"What but why, I mean what reason could she possibly have to.. Oh my god its because of me isn't it, you finally snapped at Renée didn't you, that's why they forbid you from seeing me?" I asked my words coming in a rush tears pricking my eyes.

"Bells I had to, she cant keep treating you like she does, she has to grow up and if it took my being thrown out for her to realise that she is missing out on the best thing about her entire life, you, then I am ok with that." His voice was low and soft his eyes pleading. The tears cascaded down over my checks at his words and I jumped up throwing my arms around his neck, he lifted my 15-year-old self of the ground.

"I love you big brother." I sobbed.

"I know baby-girl, I love you too." He whispered smoothing my hair.

"Ill check in on you from time to time, ok. I wont let anything happen and I wont let Renee or May no but I'll always be there for you Bells, and I'll be there the day you turn 18, and we can be a family again." He said bending down to look in my eyes his 19-year old blue Iris' meet my deep brown eyes.

**Flashback 2005**

"Connor no I-I don't understand." I whispered, it was the first time we had seen each other in 13 months. He stood before me,20 years old and very tall clad in what was the cause of the lump in my throat, a very new very clean United States Marine Corps uniform.  
"Yes you do Bells." He said quietly, his voice was gruffer than I had remembered.

"No- b-but why, where, w-w-when?" I stammered not wanting the answers I was asking for.

"May, she seized all my assets last year, no college fund, no savings the unemployment rate is growing and this was my only way out, this way I can go back to College, get a real job, start my life over Bells."

"Where Connor, where are they sending you." I begged staring him down.

"Iraq baby-girl there sending me to Iraq." I nodded solemnly.

"Figures as much." I chocked trying to get my words around the lump in my throat. Hot tears flowed freely down my checks, he looked so small and helpless in his uniform it was like nothing I had ever seen.

"I am going to come back Bells, I promise, I have a 2 year tour, but ill be back for you the day you turn 18. We can be a family again then Bells because May and Renée's restrictions die the day you turn 18, you an have your big brother back, you'll just have to be strong for me until then, can you do that for me Bells?" he asked a hint of desperation in his voice.

I nodded, a nod was all I could give him as he pulled me into a bone crushing hug, the thick material of his uniform felt foreign and cold against my skin and I shuddered to think of all the horrors it would see.

**End Of Flashbacks**

I passed the red mailbox labelled BLACK with silver tear tracks glistening down my checks. I shook my head attempting to rid myself of the memories of my Connor, my protector, My Brother.

Jake was sitting on the front porch with Quil, Seth and Embry he heard the rumbling of my truck and looked up at me with a broad smile that stretched across his entire face. I jumped from the cab on shaky legs and stumbled my way to wards him the look of joy on his face vanished as he took in my tear stained appearance.

"BELLS!" he cried running at inhumane speeds towards me, he pulled me into his arms, the warmth of his chest engulfed me.

"Bells baby what is it are you hurt, sick, talk to me please." Jake begged the glow of a mad man subtly present in his eyes.

"He didn't come back" I whispered into his shoulder. "He promised he would come back for me."

* * *

So what did you think?

Please Review

Thanks again to Aislynnrose2010 i literally couldnt have done this without you.

xxx L

-REVIEW PLEASE -

-Ideas and suggestions are always welcomed and desperately appreciated-


	14. I Even Cued the Rain

Ello Ello,

Ok so first of all I just want to apologize to the absolute atrocity that has been my spelling in previous chapters, it is almost inexcusable and incredibly embarrassing. That being said I am now very much looking for a Beta so if anyone is interested please let me no.

So its been another big gap between chapters... sorry about that, life just doesnt allow much time for writing at the moment eek.

a massive thank you to AislynnRose2010 who as always has been an enormous help with putting this chapter together, eternally grateful for her wonderful/constant help and advice.

ok so pleae enjoy 'I Even Cued the Rain.'

REVIEW PLEASE!

xxxL

p.s basically i am not completely sure were the next chapter is going so suggestions, ideas, character thoughts etc are so so so so welcome in fact there basically necessary.

p.p.s sorry about the language

R&R

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Jacob:

"EMBRY!" I yelled through clenched teeth.

"Jake wh..." Em yelled as I passed my crying girlfriend over to him and took of tearing through the woods I felt myself burst through my clothes just as I reached the comforting closure of the La Push forest.

_FUCK!_

Embry:

"Jake what the hell man!" I called after Jacob as he disappeared into the trees in wolf form.

"Hey, hey Bella shhh everything's ok" I attempted to soothe the gasping girl who had been thrust into my arms. There was no response from the semi-hysterical Bella so I tightened my grip around her waist and half carried her up the stairs into Jakes house.

"BILLY, QUIL!" I hollered as I gently deposited Bella onto the Black's couch.

Quil rolled Billy out from the kitchen both laughing but their smiles faded when they sore Bella curled up in a ball looking very small in the corner of the couch.

"Bella." Billy breathed a tone of sadness in his voice as he took in her tear-streaked face.

"What is it Bell's huh? Where's Jake?" Quill asked soothingly, his voice was so soft it was almost comical.

"Jake?" Bella said softly her eyes focused on her surroundings I watched her bottom lip tremble.

"Where's Jake?" She whispered desperation clear in her voice.

Quil and Billy's eyes turned to mine filled with concern.

"He took of just after she got here, handed her right to me and tore of into the trees" I whispered as softly I could so that only Billy could hear, but I wasn't quiet enough.

"H-he left." Bella's stated quietly her tone entirely sober, her eyes bore into the floor a look of pain and shame crossed her face fresh tears began to well n her eyes.

"I'm sure Jake will be back any second, but while we wait why don't you tell us what's got you in such a state?" Billy asked gently his hand patting Bella's shaky knee.

"He didn't come back. He promised he would come back for me, but he didn't." Bella's whispered shakily. Only one word came to mind and I was certain it was the same for Billy and Quil. _Cullen._ Bella however through us all a curve ball when the name she uttered was not the name of her former Leech.

"Connor, he didn't find me. He promised to find Me." she almost growled tears of anger brimmed over her lids.

"Bells whose Connor?" Billy asked voice the confusion we all felt.

"Connor O'Roark is my cousin, he was like a big brother to me when Renee was well..not around. He took care of me all those nights when she didn't come home. He joined the Marine Corps 3 and a half years ago." Bella whispered as the tears dried against her pale checks.

"He left and didn't come back, like everyone else in my life. He left me all alone, he abandoned me." She added in a whisper.

"Oh Bella" Billy murmured softly, I felt annoyance rise in side me, I turned to Quil the look of angered frustration clear on his face as well as my own.

"Go find Jake, and tell him to get his melo-dramatic arse back here." I growled in an under tone. Quil stormed from the house ripping his shirt of as he went and I turned my attention back to the crying girl before me while Billy set to work in the kitchen fetching her a cup of tea, I could sense his slight annoyance with Jake as well .

Quil:

I tore through the forest letting my pent up aggression have its way with the ground beneath my heavy paws.

_Jake! _I growled after phasing on the edge of the forest and running towards the sent of my brother.

_Bugger Off Quil! _Jakes thoughts called angrily back to me.

_JACOB BLACK! Your girlfriend is sobbing on _your _couch and you're out HERE mopping like a schoolboy what the hell man. _

_You sore her you heard her she wants Cullen. _

_ARGHH Jesus Jake she chose you, she could have saved Cullen's life but she chose to stay with you she's your imprint, not that you deserve her or anything. _I taunted desperate to make him get a thought through his thick head.

_What the hell is that supposed to mean_ He snarled.

_She deserves better than you Black, better than you running of on her after she came here to YOU, seeking your comfort wanting YOU to tell her that everything would be alright and tell her that her big brother would come home from IRAQ! _I mentally hollered, replaying the teary conversation with Bella through my mind.

_Oh Fuck._ Jake groaned turning on his heel/paw and sprinting back towards La Push.

_Yup pretty much_ I smirked following his lead and tailing it back to Billy's.

Jacob.

_Stupid, Stupid. It's official I am really stupid. _That was the lone thought that crossed through my head, over and over and over again.

_Yeah man you really are_ Quil through every few miles as we powered it back to La Push.

_Dude shut it. _I spat back as my paw clawed with the wet earth.

_Jake man, eventually you are gonna have to come to terms with the fact that Bells she chose you. She wants you and you need to stop second guessing your self and be there for her, take the drama out of it all, because if you don't you'll just hurt her further. _Quil said quietly his 'voice' disappearing from my mind.

_Ok Jakey boy enough with the drama now ok.. _ I phased out and pulled my shots back on jogging up to the house. I stood outside the front door for a moment to ashamed to face anyone, until I heard Bella laugh, the sound filled my ears and caused a slow smile to spread across my face. I pushed open the screen door and 3 heads flashed up towards me, Embry, Billy and Bella all glanced up at my arrival, Embry looked relieved, Billy's eyes shone with past knowing and wisdom and Bella? Well Bell's was pissed.

"Ahh the prodigal son returns," Billy chortled wheeling himself from the room.

"Yeah I am outta here too" Embry said with a quick wave as he ran out the door.

"So.." I started turning to look at Bells.

The look of anger hadn't subsided in her face and I had to restrain myself from gulping audibly.

"What the hell was that Jake?" she demanded.

"I don't know Bells I'm sorry." I offered meekly.

"Your sorry? Jesus Jake you ran out on me, when I desperately needed you. Is that the way its gonna be with us, you literally pass me of to Embry every time something goes wrong?" Her voice shook and I could see she was fighting to keep her temper in check.

"Your right Bell's I was being foolish and juvenile it won't happen again." I hung my head.

"GAHHHH!" She screamed throwing a pillow at my head with surprising strength for a girl of her sense.

I choked out a laugh as confusion flooded through me. "What was that for" I looked up at Bella's still angry eyes.

"Your 17, your not supposed to say things like 'I was juvenile and foolish' your meant to be annoying and stubborn and IMMATURE! I don't want to be some old women at 18, I wanna fight with you and scream at you and throw things and be irrational, I want passion and craziness. I don't want you to fall at my every whim and hang your head cos I am pissed. I want, I want screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain all the stuff that other teenagers get to experience, I don't want freaking werewolves and vampires and crap, I didn't sign on for that Jake, I want you the old you who used to make me so mad but so happy at the same time, I don't want to be safe Jake I want to be happy and in love and crazy. I just, I just think I need some time to think." She said the last bit softly as she quickly ran out the door.

I caught the screen before it crashed back into its frame following Bella's back outside.

"So you're pissed with me because I won't fight with you!" I called out after Bella's retreating figure. She stopped walking and her hair flicked around in the wind.

Bella:

"Yes!" I groaned. "And because you ran off o me." I added fuming still slightly.

"Oh my god Bell's I am sorry for that ok, I though you were talking about him!"

"EDWARD! You thought I came to you crying over Edward, Jake do you have any faith in me at all, or does me telling you that I love you hundreds of times mean nothing, I picked you over him, I let him die." I shrieked.

"yeah but you also nearly died yourself because of how you feel about him."

"FELT! How I FELT about him, as in don't anymore. Kind of a major difference."

"Exactly so if you FELT that way about him and your feelings change who's to say that your feelings wont change for me huh!"

"They just wont, I know it."

"Well then your psychotic." Jake called after me.

" I am NOT!" I shouted back as thunder crackled in the distance.

"No your right you're not psychotic a little disturbed maybe…"

"I am disturbed? You a freaking wolf! You ran of into the woods like the big bad wolf when your girlfriend came crying to you about her cousin, her is a freaking MARINE!"

"Yeah because when you show up in tears I immediately supposed to assume its because of this cousin I have never heard of is a Marine, something that has never seemed to effect you before!"

"ARGHH Forget it" I screamed, my fists balling at my sides, as warm rain fell from the sky, water droplets clinging to my hair.

"No, I wont forget it." Jake yelled after me.

"WHY!" I screamed once more in frustration.

"Because, I love you."

I could help but smile, as I ran towards him jumping into his arms as he smashed his lips against mine.

"Better, babe? I even cued the rain. " He asked with a wicked grin.

"Oh so Much." I laughed kissing him once more.

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sooo what did you think? REVIEW!


	15. I Promise

_Hi,_

_I'm sorry I'm sorry I' sorry I'm sorry. If you are still reading this then I truly don't deserve you as a reader but stick around because I feel bad, awful, selfish and guilty thus will try and make up for it with long , hopefully good regular updates. I have no excuse as for not writing except to say that the past 8 months my personal life went somewhat haywire, school got life and time consuming and I was entirely embarrassed over the horrendous spelling mistakes clouding the earlier chapters. For all of this I apologise. I will stop babbling now and ask of you my dear reader only one favour please, please, PLEASE review your thoughts mean the world to me and will inspire me to continue writing. Suggestions as to where to go next are always appreciated and I truly want to know good or bad what you think. Thank you for sticking with me this long. _

_xx L_

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**Bella:**

Jake drove me home through the blinding rain, I gripped his hand tightly the entire time my nerves were a wreck but thankfully my slightly psychotic mood swing had passed.

"Bells" Jake whispered quietly as we passed the sign welcoming us to Forks.

I said nothing but meet his gaze nodding slightly.

"You. You have to tell Charlie, about Connor, about René, about everything maybe he can help you, us find him."

"I-I d-don't know if I can." I whispered barely audible but knowing that Jakes super-wolf hearing would pick it up.

"I'll be there, every step of the way." he encouraged looping his arms around my shoulders as I nuzzled further into his side.

"It will all be ok, Bells. I promise" his voice was soft as he pulled up outside Charlie's house.

"Hey kids." Charlie called brightly and I was glad to see happiness returning to Charlie's tone. He looked up from the kitchen table that was strewn with papers and his faced dropped, presumably at the sight of mine.

"Charlie, we have to talk to you." Jake said slowly squeezing my hand reassuringly.

And so for the next hour I explained to both of them how Rene had behaved before meeting and marrying Phil and the Significants of Connor's presence in my childhood. All the while I could feel Jake tensing up beside me as he listened attentively to all the horrible near misses I had had over the years.

For my own benefit as well as theirs I managed to remain composed throughout the entire explanation vowing not to shed a single tear in front of Charlie or Jake, for a VERY long time.

"I'm so sorry Bells," Charlie said quietly when I finished; his eyes were full of grief and guilt, just as I had feared.

"No Dad really its not your fault, its not even Rene's she's better now, happy." I added forcing a smile that from Jake's reaction (pulling me close to his body) I take didn't convey the message I was hoping it would.

"Will find him Bells." Was all Charlie could say as he returned my pathetic, sad smile. I couldn't take standing still anymore I threw myself back into the chair hearing it skid across the linoleum floor and busied myself in the kitchen. Jake and Charlie continued to converse in hushed tones at the stable and just as I was about to question there scheming I felt Jakes warm arm snake around my waist his head resting on my shoulder.

'Hi' he breathed.

"Hi' I countered turning in his arm to see his face, and check that Charlie had in fact left the room.

"Will we ever reach normalcy?" I asked in a whisper gazing into his bottomless brown eyes.

"In truth Bells, I honestly don't know." my face fell. " But I plan on spending forever with you, so we are sure as hell gonna find out." I threw my arms around his neck and he wove his hand through my hair hugging me closer to him, his presence was all consuming and I couldn't help the feeling of warmth safety and love that encompassed me as I held onto him. Wrapping my legs around his torso I clung to him, Jacob, my lifeline in the same way that he gripped me. Despite my mom, despite Connor, despite the Cullen's I was happy. Jake needed me in the same basic desperate way that I needed him we were each others air, without him I had no way of living.

Realisation dawned on my like the rising of the sun. Edward he had been my drug, coveted, illegal superficial. I had craved him. He had been a drug and I an addict and in that sense we could never have been equals. I was constantly trying to measure up to him, an impossible feat, as he was so near perfection but in an unrealistic way. I didn't love Edward; I had been addicted to him.

But Jake, Jake was my equal, warm, caring, irritating, kind, real. Jake had been my rehab. He had become my new life, safe and loved and warm. The difference was so clear to me now like night and day. Jake had showed me how to love in a real way. Love and not crave. He had faults, just as I had mine but I loved each of them, and he bought out my flaws and made them better we were like puzzle peaces we fit together naturally neither had to change or strain themselves to be with the other. There was no danger between us, no addiction, no fear, just passion, and love.

I pulled away from his neck so that his eyes meet mine.

"Thank-you." I whispered my voice felt lighter and I knew my eyes had regained the last remnants of their sparkle with my realisation.

Jake cocked his head to the side in question.

"For being my sun, for loving me. For being there."

"Always" he whispered pressing his lips to my forehead.

"And forever" I murmured shifting me head so his lips could meet mine, I felt a tingle shoot through my body as his lips brushed against mine, his face broke into a smile and I kissed him again crushing my lips to his slightly.

**Jake:**

I heard Charlies chair creak in the other room and his fee scuff on the floor. I reluctantly broke away from Bella's lips, she looked at me with curious eyes but didn't question it, I kept contact with her through our entwined fingers and sat up on the bench next to her.

"You'll stay for dinner right? She asked in earnest.

_Of course_ I thought quickly but I wanted to see her smile. 'Only if you make pie, please Bella please, pleasssssse' I whined tugging on her hand like a little kid. Her song like laugh filled the room, as she nodded. I felt Charlie's eyes watching us from the hall and as Bella turned to grab ingredients from the fridge my eyes tracked onto his and he nodded his head once slowly, I bowed my head returning his unspoken 'thanks' and turned my attention back to Bella who seemed lighter on her feet, it was as if she danced across the kitchen. The spark that I loved and had desperately missed had returned to her eyes and I felt that I could breathe easier, as if a weight I did not know existed had been lifted form my chest. She sent me a staggering smile as she caught my watching eyes. She was happy and it made me want to sing, knowing that I had done that for her.

**Bella:**

The weeks began to pass and the normalcy I had been hoping for began to return, Charlie and I spent more time down in La Push than any where else. Victoria had not made an appearance anywhere near Forks, La Push or even Port Angeles in weeks. I knew it was a silly thing to do but I couldn't help but think perhaps she had grown tired of the chase, especially seeing as how Edward was quiet clearly no longer in the picture.

Time carried on and before I knew it Graduation was less than a month away.

"So are you getting excited?" Leah asked one afternoon. We were sitting out on the Black's front porch soaking up the afternoon sun on one of Washington's rare warm days.

"For?" I asked stupidly.

"Graduation, genius your finishing High School in what a month?" she said bumping me with her shoulder.

In the weeks since Harry's death Leah and I had become a hundred times closer. In the beginning it had been hard she still carried so much anger and pain from Sam's imprinting betrayal and her fathers death. But over time she was becoming the Leah I remember from when I was younger. She was even warming to Emily once more, understanding that the Imprint was undeniable and as much as Emily tried to resist it in the end there was nothing either she or Sam could have done to stop Leah's eventual pain. That wasn't to say that Leah didn't still have her moments, Embry in particular seemed to be a favoured verbal punching bag of Leah's but he took it all in stride, ribbing her just as much as she ribbed him.

I heard a howl that had become second nature to me, and I couldn't help but jump up from my seat. Leah laughed.

"Heel girl" she quipped but I ignored her running down the steps and across the grass, as Jake and the rest of the pack appeared on the edge of the forest dressed in there oh-so-typical cut off sweats.

"Hi pretty girl." Jake grinned as I jumped into his arms, he brushed his lips against mine and I returned the kiss hungrily. Until of course Jared and Embry felt wolf whistles and cat calls were necessary and my face went an entirely new shade of red.

"Shut up" Jake called with a laugh to his brothers who were already racing towards Sam and Emily's for an eagerly awaited meal.

"Come for a walk with me?" Jake asked sweetly the endless depths of his eyes stared into me.

"Of course, just give me one second." I kissed his lips quickly dashing away from him and back up the stairs towards Leah.

Will you be ok if I go with Jake for a little while?" I asked her with a smile.

"You don't have to babysit me you know" she said with a smile.

"I know" I countered "but I don't want to you go to Emily's alone if your not ready yet." Her face fell and I knew she was worried about it.

"I'll be fine, I think I'm gonna go for a run, while its you know 'quiet'. Wouldn't want to see _that_ show again." she snickered gesturing to Jake, colour flooding my face, I still couldn't fully wrap my mind around the packs shared thoughts thing.

"Go on run of into the sunset with the Beast, Princess Bell." I frowned at her sarcasm.

"I'll be fine Bella I promise." she added seriously all traces of sarcasm gone from her voice.

"Ok." I said sceptical "Call me if you need to talk later ok?"

"Yes mom" Leah smiled.

I waved to her and started of down the steps towards jakes waiting hand.

"Hey Bella." Leah called. I turned back to see her face a little more soft, vulnerable and Old Leah-ish than it had been yesterday.

"Yeah." I replied softly.

"Thanks, for everything."

"Anytime" I mouthed before running over to Jake.

"You're a good person Bella Swan." he said sweetly taking my hand in his.

"I learned from the best." I replied pulling our entwined hands over my shoulder so I fit perfectly into his side. He looked at me puzzled.

"You, ya big goof." I grinned as we made our way towards first beach, and he pressed his lips into my hair.

"Any news?" I asked breaking the comfortable silence. We had kicked our, well _my_ shoes off at the beginning of the track leading onto first beach and we now walked barefoot along the tide line the still icy water lapping at our feet.

"No" he answered with a shake of his head, his slightly shaggy short hair glistening in the afternoon sunlight. "But no news is good news." he added squeezing my fingers.

"Don't worry Bells, she'll never lay another hand on you. How's the arm?" he asked examining my still casted right arm.

"I trust you." I whispered pressing my lips against his shoulder. "And its fine, hardly hurts at all anymore, doctor says only a week or so left, so you won't have to deal with me clubbing you in the head for much longer." I snickered thinking of all the times I had waked the back of his head with my dud arm in recent weeks.

Jake grabbed my waist and lifted me into his arms so that my own arms rested behind his neck.

"If your clubbing me in the head while doing this then I don't think I mind to much." he murmured his lips hovering less than an inch above mine.

"Jacob Black you are far to sweet for your own good, anyone ever tell you that." I whispered closing the distance between our slightly trembling lips.

"No" he whispered as we broke away momentarily in need of oxygen.

"That's ok." I said as I ran my fingers through his beautiful jet-black hair. "I plan on reminding you every day." I added as his lips found mine once more I could almost feel the smile on his face.

Jake:

"No" I whispered as she broke away from my lips gasping for air, her immensely warm, wide and beautiful brown eyes found mine.

"That's ok." her voice was soft, beautiful and the fingers on her left 'good' arm brushed lightly through my hair.

"I plan on reminding you everyday." Her sweet voice filled my ears and my lips sought after hers as happiness flooded through me. It was one of those defining moments when you realise everything you ever wanted was coming true. Even before the wolf-ness and imprinting all I had ever wanted was the girl in my arms.

Bella:

"Will you come over for dinner tonight?" I asked hopefully as we meandered along the path back to Billy's.

"Why don't you call Charlie and ask him if wants to come down to see Billy tonight instead, its just that with the extra patrols we've been running and training Seth and Leah _and_ Collin, who only phased last week, I feel like I haven't seen my dad in ages." Jake said and one again I heard the maturity and responsibility in Jake's voice that far surpassed his nearly 18 years. Guilt crushed me as I realised that I was a contributing factor for him not seeing Billy.

"I'm sorry Jake." I said quietly realising what a distraction I had become in his life.

**Jake:**

"I'm Sorry Jake" Bella whispered her voice soft and a little sad. I stopped walking.

"Why?" I asked her quickly, concern flooding my tone.

"It's all my fault, you haven't seen your Dad because you have been spending to much time with me, and the werewolf gene is going into overdrive because of all the vampires, me again and and." she seemed to have run out of steam. I stood there looking at her gobsmacked.

_Did she really feel like that? How could she? Why would she? Did she truly not understand the desperate, never ending yearning I had to be around her. geez Bell. _

"Bell" I all but groaned.

"None of this is your fault at all. The werewolf gene began because of the Cullen's returning to forks, it has nothing to do with you; they didn't come back to forks for you. We don't know if it's the redhead or someone else who is causing the gene to continue activating, but that doesn't matter. You are a part of the pack, of our tribe you're my family it is my Job, and the entire packs job for that matter to protect you, to keep you and everyone else safe. As for spending too much time with me, how could you even think like that Bells. Don't you know, don't you understand that I _have_ to be around you? When we aren't together it eats away at me, when you're in school, god I hate it. Having to wait all day just to look into your eyes or to hear the sound of your voice. You're my everything Bells. Nothing is your fault, you understand me." I concluded my voice filled with conviction as I tilted her chin up so I could meet her eyes.

"I love you." she said softly and I grinned wrapping my arms around her, she rested her head against my arms humming a slow tune softly as we strolled on the twilight lit path back towards my house.

"Hi Charlie." I said as opening the door no more than an hour later. Bella had shouted down, quiet literally, both Dad and I for the right to cook the nights meal. Which admittedly is probably for the best seeing as how my cooking skills include burnt toast and under boiled eggs and there is only so many times you can eat Billy's infamous Pasta. Therefore Bells was in the kitchen, from which I had been promptly removed after trying to help her and knocking a pot of boiling water form the stove, thankfully I had been able to snatch her out of harms boiling way before the scolding water crashed across the room.

"Hey Jake." Charlie greeted me in return setting a six-pack of beer on the small dinner table and joining Billy on the couch in front of the Mariners game.

"Jake" My Dad called.

"Yeah." I replied snapping out of whatever Bella related daydream I had been having.

"Bring two of those over." He said gesturing to the cans Charlie had just deposited on the table.

"Ah sure." I replied slowly trying to figure out why Charlie wouldn't have simply taken them with him instead of setting them down. Shrugging my shoulders I cracked to cans away from the plastic casing passing one each to Charlie and my father.

"Have a seat son." Charlie added in a hushed tone nodding his appreciating for the drink.

"Any luck, tracking him down?" Dad asked his voice was also low and both men were looking at me intently.

I shook my head "No, the Marines said he was back in the U.S, but they couldn't give me any further information."

"I got the same thing when I contacted them last week." Charlie added with a sigh.

"Well we know he's back that's a good thing." My dad added and Charlie nodded in agreement.

"We just have to figure out where to look next, maybe if we call the veterans office in Phoenix, just to see if her is listed, also there is a military hospital we could check with." I added checking the places I had been researching off on m fingers.

"What are you three scheming about in there." Bella called I could hear the smile in her voice; it tugged at the corner of my own lips.

"Nothing Bells, just football talk." Charlie covered quickly his answering smile did not reach his eyes. I had vowed from the beginning that I refused to outright lie to Bells about looking for Connor. As much as I hated it however, I knew that hidding the truth from her about our search was the only way to keep her heart from being broken if we weren't able to locate him.

"Ok." she said the smile still in her voice but her tone doubtful. "Dinners almost ready." she added turning back to retrieve a dish from the oven.

_I will find him Bells, _I thought determinedly as I stood to offer her my dish cleaning or table setting services. Knowing full well she wouldn't accept my help in the actual cooking aspect.

_I promise._

_

* * *

_

what do you want to see happen next?

coming up possibilities.

Connor Drama

Edward Drama

Leah Imprinting

Sam and Emily's Wedding

Prom

Volturi Drama

Embry Imprinting (maybe i am not so sure on that one just yet)

let me know who/what you want to see.


	16. Purple Bra'

Hello again,

Aren't y'all proud of me I am updating this story after only 2 DAYS!

I hope you enjoyed the last chapter and that you can forgive me for my long absence.

I am looking for a Beta if anyone is interested, my only requirement is that you are able to work fast as I am_ quiet_ impatient hehe.

Thank you to everyone who favourited or alerted either me or this story recently, or ever really your support means the world to me.

Please review, I need your feed back in order to know where to take this story.

xx L,

(Playlist for this chapter.

Blue Bear- Band of Horses.

Thunder- Boys Like Girls.

Model Homes- In-Flight Safety.)

* * *

**Bella:**

"What are we going to do about college!" Jacob cried bursting through my bedroom door at, I checked my clock, 5:40 on a Sunday morning.

"J-Jake" I asked stupidly blinking wildly as early morning light burned my eyes. My voice was croaky from sleep; I coughed once to clear my throat.

"Jake what are you doing?" I asked tiredly, I had stayed up till all hours the previous evening working on revision for my calculus final, needless to say it had been a pointless study session.

"College!" Jake echoed a second time as if that was explanation for breaking down my door in the early hours of the morning.

"Jake, I still don't understand." I said sitting up and combing a hand through my wavy hair.

Jake sat down on my bed with a sigh. I could see the deep rings underneath his eyes he was dead on his feet, again.

"You're graduating next month" he stated

_Yes_ I thought nodding

"And you will be going to college." he continued.

"Well I mean not necessarily," I started

"No, No, No, NO! I will not let you give up your education because of some stupid werewolf thing." Jake started I raised a finger to his lips.

"Shh, Jake your stressing yourself out."

"I haven't applied anywhere yet, but I was talking with Leah yesterday."

"I know." Jake grumbled quietly.

"Huh?"

"That's why I am freaking out, I was phased in with Leah for patrol and she didn't really realise what she was doing but she went of on this little tangent thinking about your fabulous little plans. Why didn't you tell me you were going to go away to college? With _Leah_." He ranted somewhat incoherently

"Jake what are you talking about?"

"Leah 'said' that the two of you were going off to college _together_ in the fall."

"Jake," I said quietly taking his hand and gently pulling him so that he was lying down next to me, his giant legs half hanging off my little bed.

"If you're going to eavesdrop on Leah's thoughts at least do it properly." I joked.

He was either too tired or worked up to understand my lame attempt at humour so I once again put a finger to his soft warm lips to silence any possible response.

"Jake, yesterday Leah and I were talking and she ask what I wanted to do after school. The only thing I could think of wanting to do was maybe teach, teach kids in La Push which is why we _both _are considering taking a course three times a week in Seattle or Port Angeles to become teaching qualified, that way I can stay close to home, close to you." I added softly turning my face a little so as to see his own face, his eyes.

"Y-you wanna teach kids at La Push." Jake stuttered a little over his own words.

"Um yes." I replied slightly nervous.

Jake's next moved surprised me, he moved with inhumane speed, just because he could, and was suddenly hovering slightly above me, I could feel the heat radiating from his body but I wasn't crushed beneath his giant form. His lips sought mine hungrily. I tangled my left arm into his hair pulling his face down closer to mine.

"You don't want to go away?" He panted between kisses.

"No" I struggled to get the words out and suck in fresh air before slamming my lips back into his.

"Never, not without you" I added breathlessly.

"I love you." He whispered breaking away from my lips softly his eyes raking over my face memorizing it. I freed my left hand from his hair and traced the slight purplish bags under his tired eyes.

"You should sleep, I should sleep." I said stifling a yawn.

Jake said nothing; he merely pulled me into his side wrapping an arm protectively around my waist.

"Now I can sleep." He murmured into my hair,

"And Jake" I murmured fighting against sleep.

"It's not some stupid werewolf thing, it's because I love you." I whispered as I drifted back to a world of dreams.

* * *

"Bells!" Charlie's voice sounded like he was calling to me through water.

"Bella are you up?" Charlie called again; my eyes flew open as I heard Charlie's feet creaking up the stairs. I flew out from under Jake's arm grabbed my dressing gown wrapping it tightly around my body and slipped out the door padding quickly down the stairs.

"Oh Bell, you are up?" Charlie said his voice rising as if in question.

I nodded not trusting my voice.

"I was just coming up to let you know I'm headed out for the day, got some paperwork to fill in at the station, what with all these Seattle disappearances. There's a, ah baseball game on this afternoon, and, well ah, a bunch of the guys from the station are going to, um Michael's to watch and.." he trailed off.

"Dad, I'll be fine." I said quickly rejoicing in the idea of spending the day alone with Jacob.

"Are you sure Bells, I hate want to leaving you here alone so much." Charlie said looking sheepish.

_So he doesn't know Jake is here. _I thought to myself gleefully.

"No really Dad I'll be fine. I'll hang out with Jake or something." I added tactfully knowing that under all technicalities that wasn't a lie.

"Ok." Charlie said slowly, " but there is a big storm coming in so get Jake to come get your or stay here, I worry about you by yourself in that truck."

"Sure, sure." I said nodding, my mind drifting back to the sleeping teenager in my bed.

"And tell Jake I said Hi." Charlie added as he began to make his way back down the stairs.

"W-what." I spluttered. _Sprung, oh god. _

"When he gets here later on tell him I said hello." Charlie looked at me like I was mental.

"Get some sleep Bells. Your head is all over the place." Charlie chuckled with a wave as he grabbed his keys and head out the door.

"Yeah." I nodded with a nervous laugh.

I heard the cruisers engine rev into gear and exhaled a deep sigh of relief leaning against the kitchen wall. I raced back up the stairs taking them two at a time and peeked my head in through my bedroom door. Jake lay just as I left him, his too long legs hanging of the end of my bed. He looked so innocent and peaceful that I couldn't bring myself to wake him. I slipped back out of the room and back down the stairs, the kitchen being my final destination.

I always found that there was something very soothing about cooking. For no matter what was happening in the world, supernatural or otherwise If you added flour to a cake it would rise, if you set water on the stove it would be boil. Cooking was full of consistencies. I set to work whipping a pancake batter into frenzy and setting bacon on the stove to cook. I grabbed a bag of biscuits I had made the previous week from the freezer and began warming them in the microwave. Twenty minutes. I heaved 2 plates, one at least double the size of any normal meal, up the stairs kicking my bedroom door open with my foot.

Jake lay asleep on my bed and my alarm clock read 10:45, I knew if I didn't get food into him soon he would quiet literally eat the entire contents of my refrigerator. Disturbingly I had seen just that happen 2 weeks ago with Quil.

"Jake." I whispered wafting the plate of pancakes, bacon, eggs and biscuit beneath his nose. A tranquil smile crossed his face but he didn't stir.

"Jacob." I whispered a little louder, shaking his shoulder, the big good didn't even swat my hand away.

A somewhat risky idea came to my mind as I slumped onto the edge of my bed brainstorming how best to wake him. I deposited his plate with mine on the desk and crept back onto my bed. I crawled up to jakes side and threw my leg over his stomach so I straddled his torso, the fingertips of my left hand gliding a long the sculptured contours of his chest. I bought my face down to his, my lips brushed against his feather light. I squeezed one eye open to see his eyes remained closed.

_Damn it Jake_ I cursed. Abandoning any remaining restraint.

I pressed my lips against his hard, I ran my tongue lightly over his bottom lip and I heard him moan quietly.

I kissed him quickly once more before raising my head to meet his eyes.

"Well good morning to you too." He smiled his fingers brushing through his tousled hair.

I smiled sheepishly.

"Feel free to wake me up like that every morning Bells" Jake added grinning like an idiot.

"Shut up." I laughed, " I might have to, you sleep like the dead Jake. I even dangled food under you nose any still nothing."

"Food?" he questioned immediately.

"I made you breakfast." I said quietly.

"God, I love you." he groaned pressing his lips to my forehead.

"So its true, the key to a mans heart is through his stomach." I snickered fetching our breakfast from the desk.

"You know that's not true." Jake said a fork full of food already halfway to his mouth.

"Sure, sure." I smiled breaking of a peace of biscuit.

"Bells?" Jake asked his tone serious.

"Of course I know Jake." I smiled as he lightly played with the fingers of my right, cast ridden, hand.

"Although cooking like this doesn't make me love you any less, that's for sure." He added with a laugh.

I grabbed the closest book and wacked him in the shoulder with it.

"Ow," Jake cried feigning injury.

"Oh I'm sorry baby do you want me to kiss it better." I teased.

He nodded like a little boy and I pressed my lips lightly to his 'injured' shoulder.

"All better."

He shook his head and I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Now my lips hurt." his voice was soft.

I rolled my eyes at him but melted into his kiss, as breakfast became the last thing on either of our minds.

* * *

"I need food." Jake cried as we walked into Sam and Emily's I could tell that the mouth-watering smell of fresh muffins, and warm bread hit him like a tonne of bricks. I released his hand with a knowing smile a he surged towards the table of food and his brothers.

"Jake you ate like, an hour ago." I laughed jumping up onto the bench next to Emily.

"Exactly" he mumbled his reply partially obscured by the blueberry muffin he had just taken an enormous bite out of.

"That's the one thing you never get totally used to." Em laughed draping an arm around my shoulders in a sideways hug.

"The abyss that is their stomachs." I laughed as Jake, Quil, Embry, Sam, and Jared crammed their mouths full.

"Where's Collin?" I asked of the newest wolf that I was yet to meet, knowing that he wasn't on patrol with Paul and Seth.

"With Leah." Sam replied answering my next question about Leah's whereabouts, I raised my eyebrow at him and Quil choked a laugh.

"She used to babysit him as a kid, so he's calmest around her."

"He's been having issues phasing back." Jake added his eyes a little sad; I know he had had the same problem when he first started phasing. I offered him a knowing smile and he winked at me.

The Five wolves heads snapped towards the front door and a few seconds later it swung open revealing a boy who despite the enhanced werewolves growth looked impossibly young and gangly.

Emily slid of the bench and I followed her lead.

"Collin." Emily said and a pair of startled blue eyes looked up.

"Collin, this is Bella Swan." She added gesturing towards me.

"Hi," I said brightly sticking out my hand, the young boys warm hand found mine and he looked down at my shyly.

"Jake's girl." he clarified snickering slightly as I nodded then a look of horror flashed across his face as he blushed a very deep shade of red.

Jared barked out a laugh, and Embry thumbed Quil, who appeared to be choking on his food, on the back with laughing tears in his eyes.

I looked between the 3 laughing werewolves to Jake whose face was a direct split between anger and laughter then back to Collin who looked very much like he wanted to melt into the floor.

"Purple bra." he whispered.

Emily let out a slight giggle, Quil who had recovered from his chocking joined Embry and Jared who were howling with laughter. I spun on my heel lat glaring at Jake who raised his arms in defeat flashing me a sheepish grin.

_So he had been watching_ I thought to myself a slight smile gracing my lips. Collin ducked his head in silent apology and made his way towards the food his ears still burning red. Jake wrapped his arms around me as Emily and I picked up the mugs of coffee we had previously abandoned from the kitchen bench.

"I'm sorry." He whispered with a smile in his eyes.

I shook my head, kissing his lips quickly to silence any further apology.

"Jake!" Embry called.

"Let us know today's colour k?" Jared chuckled and without breaking form my lips Jake grabbed a bottle opener from the top draw and sent it flying towards Jared's head.

"Jake" I yelled breaking his kiss startled. Everyone laughed as I looked up to see Jared twirling the opened between his fingers. I joined in their laughter, as several things seemed to occur at once.

The front door swung open again more to reveal Leah, looking a little shy and nervous I smiled at her as Emily beckoned her further inside. She took a few tentative steps before a blaring howl ripped through the peaceful scene the 4 men at the table threw their chairs back, I heard a thump as Embry's crashed to the floor.

Collin looked around panic and fear clear in his blue eyes I was about to offer him a nervous smile when Jake grabbed my shoulders.

"Bells, stay here, with Emily. Ok? Promise me you won't leave," I nodded quickly as he brushed his lips against mine.

"I love you," he whispered as I closed my eyes shut tightly nodding once more. He released my shoulders and I opened my eyes but he was already pulling his shirt over his head as he followed Quil and Embry out the door.

"You too." I said softly preying he could hear me.

I glanced to my left and saw Emily nod as Sam kissed her forehead before nodding to Collin who sprinted from the house with Sam quick behind him. He slowed as he saw Leah standing frozen in the hallway.

"Protect them Lee-Lee? Please" his voice was quiet but through the crushing new silence his words rung through the house. Leah nodded her agreement quickly and Sam raced after his pack, towards whatever danger awaited them.

_This is taking to long_ I thought to myself glancing at the clock which read 5:34, the same as it had the last 6 times I had checked. I sighed turning on my heel to walk back across the living room for the thousandth time. Emily was in the kitchen, producing muffins by the dozen, she had already exhausted her larders chocolate chip supply with the trays full of cookies.

I jumped at the feeling of my cell vibrating in my pocket and I fished it out of my dark jeans. The caller I.D barely registered in time for me to put on a cheery façade.

"Dad." I almost squeaked the fake calm clear in my own voice.

"Hi Bells, how's it going?" Charlie asked the insincerity in my voice clearly not visible through the phone line.

"Oh everything's great Dad I am down in La Push, ah baking with Emily, Leah's here too. Jake's just gone down to the um garage with Quil and Embry they should be back soon." From the sad smile Emily gave me my lie was at least convincing.

"Ok Kiddo, well the storm is starting to hit forks so I suspect its headed down La Push way soon, maybe you should stay down there tonight, with Leah or Emily." Charlie suggested and a tiny part of me breathed a sigh of relief.

"Sure Dad, I am sure they won't mind."

"Ok Bell, well I'll see you after school tomorrow I guess. Stay safe.

"Ok will do. Love you dad."

"You too Bells, bye." the phone went dead and I couldn't resist throwing it towards the couch.

"You did well, is everything ok?" Emily asked pulling yet _another_ tray of muffins from the oven.

I nodded resting my head against the cool raised granite breakfast bar.

"My dad wants me to stay in La Push tonight, wait out the storm and what not." I muttered refusing to raise my aching head from the cool serenity of the countertop.

"That's a good idea the sky is beginning to turn fowl." Emily's voice was soothing and calm, but the strain and stress was evident in her constantly whipping and kneading hands.

"If the boys aren't back tonight, your welcome to stay here. I'd, I'd appreciate it if you would." Emily's voice dropped to a frightened whisper.

I looked up at her meeting her eyes, our shared fear and pain connecting us.

"Of course Em." I whispered.

I had never had lots of girl friends. Alice had been my closest female confident and even then almost anything I told her was carried on to Edward thus we could never discuss things freely. So my growing friendship with both Emily and Leah surprised even me a little, it seemed that with both of them I was able to talk freely and openly in a way I had never really experienced before. Leah who was more of a guy-friends kind of girl, was quickly becoming my closest friend, she was only a year my senior, and was privy to my messed up supernatural world and shared my truly bizarre sense of humour.

With Jake I knew I could share everything but there were something's I didn't want to talk to him about, and for that alone I would have been grateful to have Emily and the older sister even slightly mothering advice she constantly offered. She was a caring and maternal woman in a way my mother had never been and so despite only being 6 or 7 years older than myself, she had become an older protective sister of sorts. Also being able to share the constricting fear, and almost physical pain that came with being a werewolf's soul mate with Emily was an incredibly relieving fact. Within 6 short weeks my relationship with both women had blossomed to the point that I know new I couldn't imagine not having in my life.

"Us wolf girls have to stick together." she smiled, but her grin did not meet her eyes.

"That includes you Leah." she called a little louder so that Leah who was currently patrolling the perimeter of the house could hear.

"Does it ever get any easier?" I asked quietly.

Emily took my hand and led me towards the creamy couch that had mocked me as I paced back and forth across the room. I sat down with her and she began brushing my hair through her fingers absentmindedly braiding it into loose intricate patterns.

"Little by little the hysteria and panic that you are feeling right now fades, but the fear and the pain in your gut that never fades, you just get really good at finding things to pass the time. As you can see I bake, it tricks my mind into believing I am being helpful. But when Sam is gone I can't sleep or focus properly. You just hope and prey to whatever god or destiny or fate you believe in that he will come home to you not a scratch on him. It's the waiting that's the worst, this right here and that pain its almost nausea, that's the imprint I swear it can almost sense danger." Her voice had a calming effect over me and I found myself desperate to ask her all the questions about imprinting that had been building up inside of me.

"Do you resent it, the imprint I mean?" This time my voice was little more than a whisper against the silence in the room.

"Most of the time no. But its torture knowing that at first at least a small part of Sam hated me."

"What?" I chocked.

"It was very different for us. You and Jacob are quiet rare, even for imprints, you were great friends, you loved each other before the imprint. Sam and I didn't know each other at all until he imprinted. He was so in love with Leah, and keeping the secret from her it was killing him, but they were doing ok. Then I showed up one day and I took it all away from both of them. I think there is a part of me that will never forgive myself for it." I opened my mouth to protest but she continued on.

"I know that it isn't my fault and that it was all pre-determined by some wolfish thing but the pain I caused my cousin, Bella I broke her heart Sam's too. He didn't want to love me, he wanted to love Leah, marry _her_." Her voice broke slightly. Years of unshed tears threatening to fall. I knew in that moment that she had not spoken to anyone about this before, I took her hand in mine squeezing it tight, and she offered me a weak smile.

"But things are different now, I know they are Emily, I've seen the way Sam looks at you, he truly loves you not in an imprinting way." She nodded.

"I know and I feel the exact same for him, I love him with all my heart Bella I truly do in every way except for one he has made me happier than I could ever imagine, but."

"But Leah." I supplied for her.

"She was my best friend and I took everything from her, how could she ever forgive me for that." Emily cried tears finally escaping her pretty dark eyes and slipping down her scared and smooth checks.

"Maybe if she heard the pain and regret in your voice." A sad voice form behind us offered.

Both Emily's head and mine whipped around to see Leah; her cropped dark hair windswept, tears glistening in her crystal blue eyes.

"I'm so, so sorry Lee-Lee." Emily wept getting up from the couch moving tentatively towards her cousin.

"I know Emsy." Leah said crying also as she embraced her cousin, and I couldn't help the smile that spread across my face. In that moment watching the reunited friends embraces I was overcome with a desperate need for my own best friend. I wanted Jake; I needed him to hold me not because of the pull of the imprint but because I was in fact hopelessly in love with my best friend.

The hours stretched on longer, Emily who walked with a lighter bounce in her step was getting more and more nervous, Leah kept excusing herself to phase and receive updates from Sam and the rest of the pack. She had been ordered to tell Leah and I nothing of their progress or whereabouts. The barely distinguishable sun slipped behind the trees and rain and wind lashed against the side of the house, our fears began to rise.

"Where are they Leah." I begged of her as she came dripping wet into the house at 10:30 lightening illuminated the sky outside and Emily passed me another candle to light as we prepared for the black out that was sure to come.

"Bells, you know I physically _can't_ tell you." Leah almost groaned her voice sounding strained.

A strange look passed over Leah's face.

"Leah!" Emily cried.

"Leah, what is it?" I called jumping over the back of the couch grabbing her shoulders.

"It's gotta be a trap." she whispered her hand flying to her mouth as she began to shake her eyes wide with fear.

* * *

Soooo what did you thing. Cliff-hanger i know don't hate me then next chapter is almost done.

Review :)


	17. REPOSTING UNDER NEW NAME 'SURRENDER'

Hi.

The short version of this message is I AM REPOSTING THIS STORY WITH A FEW EDITS AND A LOT OF SPELLING/GRAMMAR CORRECTIONS AS WELL AS THE REST OF IT'S CHAPTERS! the story is called 'Surrender'

PLEASE GO CHECK IT OUT! also i am sorry for the abandonment.

Hello There Lovely Readers who are kindly interested enough to stick around and hear my more long winded story change explanation.

First and foremost I would like to apologise to readers, reviewers and subscribers for falling of the face of the earth a bit with this story.

Initially the decision to discontinue this story was accidental and unintentional my life and schooling got very hectic all of a sudden and that in conjunction with some heavy duty writers block left me with no time nor any new ideas. However I came back after a few months of not writing with some fresh ideas and what not however upon arriving at ye old fan-fic page i noticed that my story had fallen victim to some serious story poaching and not just the creative licensing kind like spelling errors and all had shown up in someone elses fic. After that I got kind of discouraged because while they say plagerism is the highest form of flattery I don't really see it that way. To me this forum-y place has honestly just been a place to see if anyone even likes my writing. Finding my passions in other forms of literature this story has never been about paying homage to Twilight (Sorry fangirls) or 'shipping' anyone/thing it was and continues to be my little-idea-that-grew of where Bella and Jacob's relationship could have gone if given the chance.

ANYWAY! I have held my grude long enough and having freshly graduated high school (woaaaaaah) i am ready and roaring to edit, spellcheck and repost this story under the new name SURRENDER! Please read, love, enjoy, hate, laugh at, comment on and REVIEW etc please i love you all for it.

Story-poacher-kids however be warned cross me again and I am coming after you :).

xx L


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